Legend of Zelda: Hentai of Time (by Kevin Keane)
by Midnight Spawn
Summary: This is a direct copy/paste of a story by Kevin Keane (different site). I DID NOT WRITE ANY OF IT IN ANY SHAPE FORM OR FASHION. It is a direct copy/paste. Basically, Link gets it on with many of the girls he meets along his quest. LEMON! LEEEEMMOOOONNNN! Nothing but lemon. Read it on the original site here: h tt p:/ /ww w.g e o cit i es. ws /gotta kill em all/
1. Princess Ruto

Part I  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 10-13-99

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON FANFIC WRITTEN USEING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. THIS STORY TAKES PLACE IN THE WATER TEMPLE WHERE YOU SEE RUTO AGAIN FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 7 YEARS. IF YOU'RE NOT FAMILIAR WITH THIS PART OF THE GAME JUST KNOW THAT SHE COMES ON TO YOU AND TELLS YOU TO FOLLOW HER AND DISAPPEARS IN THE UPPER CHAMBER... EXCEPT NOW SHE STAYS!

"It's so nice to see you again." she smiled with that same seductive grin Link remembered from the last time he saw her. Only this time instead of making him scared he felt sorta... nice.

"Well, ah... good to see you too..." he didn't know what this feeling was but ever since he 'grew up' he was feeling it more and more around women. The firt time was when Saria kissed him for rescuing her from the Forest Temple. She said something about wishing she could have grown up too, but he didn't understand her. Next was when he went to get Epona from Lon-lon Ranch and Ingo had locked him in, he had to spend the night in the barn. Malon came to apologize and spent the night there, and kept inching closer to him and he kept inching away (he was still a kid at heart).

He didn't get a wink of sleep that night as his fear slowly turned to thoughts of her... *naked?* That didn't make any sense, but then why did it haunt his thoughts so? As dawn closed in she stired and turned so that he could see the side of her chest through the armpit of her night gown. The next thing he knew he was bleeding at the nose and blushing so hard his face felt like it was on fire.

"So have you come to consumate our engagement?" Ruto asked.

"Hunh? What... I" Link snaped out of his daydream.

"Have you COME to consu-MATE our ENGAGEMENT?" she emphasized.

Link found this hard to belive, he may have been totally naive but he did know the word mate. "I... ah, is this about the saphire I borrowed?"

"BORROWED?! Do you hate me that much?" she bit her lip and increased her cute- ness by at least 80%. Link drew closer in a puzzled, what-did-I-do look. "That sapfire was my 'most precious gift' I thought you knew."

"Knew what?" he managed to spit out although he wasn't listening to her at all because for the first time he was realizing that she was completly naked. I mean he had always known, but he had never registered it.

She put her arms together and cried (which looks kinda wierd underwater) as she curled up againts his manly chest. "It was the material form of all the love I have for you, it symbolizes the fact that we were meant to be together forever."

Normally the thought of Ruto expecting him to marry her was 'icky' but with her clamped against his chest like this it seemed probable... Wait no no no. He kissed her on the lips which suprised even him and said "I'm sorry but we come from different worlds. We're probably not even compatable."

At first she was slightly upset that he kissed her and then dumped her, but then she realized [He really does care about me! He really wants to but he can't, I guess it is a bit too much to ask of him] "I know... but, please... for just right now, could we pretend?" As she brushed up closer still she felt his 'appreciation' for her bump into her thigh.

Link froze, he didn't know what to do, Malon hadn't felt his 'what-boys-always- have' and he didn't know what girls thought about it. Ruto looked at him and smiled. [I guess they like it] which made it stand taller.

"Here, let me adjust that for you." she said fliping his tunic up and slidding a hand down into his tights.

Tremendous amounts of blood shot out of his nose and pushed his head back from the force (if you've ever seen Plastic Little it looked like the one where Nicol sees her in the "bathroom" which is really a water-slide theme park [don't ask]).

[Wow, with a nose-bleed like that he has to be a virgin! I may not get to be his intended but I'm taking a pice of him with me.] "First time?" she giggled. She was going to have fun with this... even though she wasn't quite sure what to do being a virgin herself (in the sense that she had never had sex before, Zoras don't have hymens; it comes from being egg-layers).

Link couldn't talk, so she kissed him, then put one of his hands on her breast and held it there. "Go ahead, you know you want to know what they feel like." And did he ever! He tentativly squeezed it, then let go. [hmmmph, this is going to be harder than I thought] She decided that she was going to help him by example so she started to take off his tunic when-

*GASP!*GLUB!* Link was choking! She had forgotten that he was an air breather! She put it back on but he still had water in his lungs, she pulled on him and took off his iron boots and floated up to the switching room.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\FADE IN TO RUTO/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"Oh, thank goodness you're alive... I'M SORRY!" She threw herself onto him and cried, she had almost killed the one she loved.

"It's not your fault-" he said.

Her eyes sparkled, "Really? You forgive me?"

[Damn she looks beautiful! How could I have not noticed before?] "Of course."

"Ya-ta! I mean is there anything I can do?"

"Shut up and kiss me." Link had had enough waiting, he slowly turned her over and positioned himself on top of her. [Okay don't screw this up, one of these holes is the right one, I don't want to look stupid]

"If your too nervous we can wait." she said (mainly because she was so nervous.

"No, we've come this far..." [what should I say now?! I certainly can't ask! Okay the first one looks two small and that one must be her butt, so I guess I'll chose 'middle' this gave him some comfort because 'middle' was the passageway he always chose first, since the first time he could remember having three options.

He started in, Ruto's face turned bluer. "Are you okay?" he asked worridly.

"I'm fine" she assured him.

[It's probably nothing, her blood must be blue and that's how she blushes] He continued in and she started to moan, so he pulled out but it felt so good inside that he felt compelled to enter a second time. After a while he started to pick up the pace as Ruto started to breathe heavier. He kept going faster and faster until he felt so good it hurt. He paused for a sec then pumped a few more times and then he felt something warm and wet splash against his manhood. Before he could question it though, he felt his own 'warm and wet' stuff shoot into her. His inner child slipped in [eewwww! This is disgusting! I'm gonna get kooties!]

He looked down as Ruto grimaced slightly (but in a cute way) from the orgasm. [No, this wasn't disgusting; and if having kooties means doing this then count me in!] He felt his member soften but he didn't take it out, not yet.

"Thank you, Link; you don't know how much this means to me." Ruto sighed, for inside she knew that it was only for pretend and he was going to leave her.

[Oh, no. Now look what I've done, here I was trying to be all noble and stuff but now I've just made it harder for us to get along as 'friends'.] "Well I have to solve this dungeon, so um... I'll see you later." he stood up and started putting his clothes back on.

"Take care..." [damn this really hurts!] "take care of yourself and remember you'll always have me,... when things grow dim." Ruto fought off a tear as she kissed him goodbye.

THE END FOR NOW

WELL, WHAT DID YOU THINK? I KNOW THIS ONE WAS SLOW AND SOMEWHAT UNSATISFYING BUT IT NEEDED TO BE BECAUSE THEY WERE BOTH VIRGINS. I PARTICULARY HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE ARE HAVE SEX FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THESE LEMONS AND START BY MASSIVE ORAL SEX AND OTHER STUFF THAT NAIVE PEOPLE JUST WOULDN'T DO. ANYWAY, "STAY TUNED" I'M NOT SURE HOW MANY CHAPTERS THIS STORY WILL HAVE BUT TWORDS THE END HE'LL START MANIPULATING TIME TO SOLVE A FEW PROBLEMS I HAVE WITH THE GAME (WHICH MAY OR MAY NOT BE RESOLVED IN THE SEQUAL, BUT THEN AGAIN NO ONE ELSE SEEMS TO CARE WHEN THEY DON'T KNOW SOME- THING.


	2. Malon

Part II  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 10-16-99

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON FANFIC WRITTEN USEING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. THIS STORY TAKES PLACE AFTER MY FIRST PART AND AS LINK EXITS THE WATER TEMPLE AND THE LAKE FILLS UP AND ZORA'S DOMAIN (SUPPOSEDLY) STARTS TO THAW OUT.

"So are you coming with me?" Link asked.

"No, I need to go back to my father, to make sure everything's thawing. Tell Sheik thanks." said Ruto splashing off stopping to wave before diving down and disappearing.

As it turned out Sheik had saved her before hand, but why did he have to say thank you?, the Sheik-guy creeped him out. Besides every time Link saw the Sheik he'd talk so much that Link couldn't get an single word in. Sure enough the Sheik appeared and talked about things, Link wasn't listening [this guy must not have a life, and I think he might have a crush on me... everyone else does.] Link is of course referring to Malon, Saria, Ruto, and even Navi whom he once woke up to see her dashing away so as not to get caught kissing him. [I must be very attractive, but maybe it has something to do with me being the 'hero']

Sheik finished what he was saying and Link stepped forward to try to deliver his message, but he was blinded by a flash as the Sheik disappeared. "Damn, what's up with that guy?" Link said in frustration. The Sheik (who always seems to hang around after 'disappearing') let out a tear, [I'm sorry Link, but it's imperative that I keep up this disguise or else Gannon will find me. At least for now you cannot know that I am in fact the princess Zelda.]

"Hya," Link galloped away on Epona. It was getting late and he needed to put his horse in her stall. On his way to the ranch he thought about the things he had been doing in the past couple of hours. When he had entered the temple he had no idea that Ruto would be there, so beautiful, so grown up, and especially naked! [Of course, dummy! she was always naked!] he thought to himself. [How could I have not noticed before, was I really that stupid? No, not stupid, just naive.

After several hours and a grueling battle with his 'dark-self' he had finally gotten to the end of the temple only to have Ruto come to 'help take the credit.' He couldn't look at her then, every time he did he blushed. But then he had heard her scream, and he looked up to see the water itself groping her. *A LITTLE NAUGHTY- TENTACLE ACTION FOR YOU GUYS* It was one of the hardest battles he had ever fought, he still couldn't believe what they had done earlier, and now he had to defeat a monster with her moaning and grunting as she tried not to be aroused.

As it probed her nether regions he was trying to attack the nucleus, and every time he missed it would grab him and squeeze his genitals and then through him against a wall. When he had finally defeated it (with a simotaniously screaming orgasm by Ruto as he struck) she sat there still panting and crying, and when he tried to comfort her she stood up and said, "At least it wasn't my first time. That would be tragic." But even a fool could see she was feeling violated. She wouldn't hear of it though, "she was a tough girl who could handle things on her own." He had tried to explain that it was groping him too but that seemed a little self-centered. [At least it wasn't her *first* time I guess].

As he arrived at Lon-lon Ranch he heard the wolf howl, he knew the stalfos would show up soon. After he put Epona in her stall he turned around to go into the haystack, his 'room'-

"It's about time you got here." Link jumped back knocking into the wall, it was Malon and she was completely naked. "I've been waiting for you for hours, I was getting cold." she nudged up against him like a horse would, "could you warm me up?"

"What the- who- why... but-but last night you spent the whole time with me and you never-" she pushed him into the trough, sat on him, and kissed him force- fully. "Ouch... damn, what happened to you girl?"

"What's up with you? I had my sexiest nightie on and several times I turned so you could see 'key' parts of my body, I even spent half the night resting my head on your manhood... But no, none of my subtle hints 'did it' for you- you brought this on yourself, boy." she started to take off his tunic.

[I'm sorry Ruto... wait, that was a 'goodbye' thing... I shouldn't remain faithful to her... NO, stop that! You're just making excuses-] Link couldn't think straight as Malon placed her vagina around Link's pulsing member. [I don't know what to do... I guess I'll straighten it out later, sorry again Zelda] Link looked up to see Malon's lucious breasts bouncing slightly as she pumped up and down on him. He had never 'been ridden' before nor had he ever heard of a girl being on top.

After awhile she started to slow down, "I've never been on top before... it's harder than it looks." Link sat up, ready to roll over on to her, but then she stood up and then bent down hugging a support beam. "Come on, enter me Link."

[She's been watching the horses too much] thought Link, but he wasn't about to say something, for fear of letting on that he was 'experienced.' He pushed in slowly and then out and then in again. "HARDER DAMMIT!" she screamed. [Nani? what's up with her? She's hornier than... well something.] "It's bad enough that it's so small-" she stopped [had she really just said that!?]

"Um, excuse me..." Link knew he had to question this.

"I'm sorry, it's just- um, well..." Link looked at her sternly, "It's the horses okay! Are you happy!? You won Talon's stupid chicken game and he offered my hand in marriage and you accepted!"

"He said he was only joking, and what does that have to do with horses?"

"That was the last time I saw you, and when I entered my teen years I needed someone to masturbate to. So I chose you." she paused, Link looked even more con- fused than ever, "Anyway one day when I was milking the cows I saw one of the male horses mount Epona. When I first saw it I began to blush and turned away... As the days went by I found myself admiring that big thing and how it would feel inside of me. When I found myself masturbating to only the horse I decided that the only way to get it out of my mind was to do it. So one night I entered the stall naked, walking on all fours and rubbed my butt up against it [it felt **sooo** good] he immediately jumped on top of me making me fall to the ground, as I started to get up it plunged into me, it really hurt at first but it slowly subsided to pleasure."

[Link was dumbfounded, he did want to enter her but he couldn't compete with a beast twice his size] "That's what you get for setting your expectations too high he grabbed a breast and "honked" it (he squeezed and said beep beep in a taunting sort of way).

"What did you do that for?" she moaned.

"What did you do horses for? You made me horny and... *I really wanted to squeeze them*" [Great job dummy! That was only the lamest excuse-]

"Mmmmmmmm, do it again..."

[Of course! She's always pinned under a horse so these never get any attention (Oh great, I'm treating this like a dungeon puzzle)] He squeezed and fondled one and then both. "Oh, oohhhh!" [I hope no one hears us] Link thought as he kept rocking her tits back and forth and saw that it was making her snatch all wet, which made his little brother stood up, ready for penetration. He plunged in faster this time.

"Oh, Link... your the only man I've ever loved." she moaned.

"Yes... man, but when it comes to beasts, you're one sick puppy." he said.

"I never should have told you that, lets just concentrate on the- auhhhh!"

Link squeezed her chest so tight he thought he could feel his fingers touch. "If that's the way you want it." [Link realized he was starting to act strange but he didn't care... Malon hadn't saved herself for him, he hadn't saved himself for her, this relationship was purely for sex. He did feel a little guilty though, his relationship with Ruto (although much sweater) was also all about sex.

"Oh, Link... I- I think I'm about to-" Link had been waiting for this, he grabbed her thighs and pushed himself as deeply into her as he could manage and shot forth his white seed. As she felt it pouring into her she couldn't stand it anymore, "Kee-yaaaa!" she threw her head back, giving Link a wonderful, slow-motion, gravity-defying, tit-shot. She sat up and squinted at him, "Humans are better, even if they are small," she teased.

Link hugged her, "So, are you gonna stop doing the horses?"

"Only if you promise to stay here forever," she replied.

"Now, you know I can't do that. I'm a hero on the run, besides I need to save the princess. You understand."

"Of course,... but you will still live here until you do, right?"

"Okay," he said as he pulled a tarp over them, "but you've gotta promise not to do the horses anymore."

She kissed him... "We'll see."

THE END FOR NOW

WELL, WHAT DID YOU THINK? AS LINK GETS MORE AND MORE 'EXPERIENCED' THESE STORIES WILL GET BETTER AND BETTER, (YOU KNOW CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND ALL THAT). BE SURE TO KEEP READING, NEXT TIME LINK GOES TO THE SPIRIT TEMPLE AND WE WILL SEE WHAT THE INFAMOUS FAVOR NABOORU PROMISES REALLY IS.


	3. Nabooru

Part III  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 10-18-99

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON FANFIC WRITTEN USEING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. THIS STORY TAKES PLACE WHEN LINK GOES TO THE SPIRIT TEMPLE AS AN ADULT, ONLY TO RETURN AS A KID. (SEE GAME, TEMPLE: 4) ONCE AGAIN IF YOUR NOT FAMILIAR WITH THE GAME IGNORE THE PLOT AND JUST READ THE SEX PART). LINK HAS JUST BATTLED AND ENTIRE TRIBE OF WOMEN ONE BY ONE.

Link was glad to be through the windy desert, he had a heck of a time trying to follow that ghost but he had finally made it. After a brief interlude, and new song from Sheik, Link found out that the only way through the temple was through a tiny crawl space. Fortunately his new song let him warp easily so he was back again as a kid in 'no time' (actually negative 7 years time).

As he entered he walked up to the crawl space [gosh, these steps have gotten a lot bigger. I don't know why I ever liked being a kid.]

"HALT, WHO GOES THERE?" said a dark silhouette.

"Link..." he said [D'oh I probably should have used a fake name.]

"Say, you look just about small enough... Do you think you could fit through this crawl space?" she pointed.

Link looked at it, "Sure as Hell." [maybe I over did that... I want to imprint myself as someone up to the task but I don't want her to know that I'm doing this for myself]

"My, my, aren't we feisty. Look, somewhere in this temple is a treasure that makes a person strong enough to defeat even Gannon... If you get it for me, I'll do something NICE for you." she grinned.

[Dahh- sex again? am I that han- wait, I'm a kid now... that look seems to be a I'm-using-you-for-my-own-purposes grin. She had better put out. NO, there I go again, but this is the first time I've been horny as a kid. Oh, it all comes from fighting an entire tribe of beautiful, sexy,.. charming,... sensual]

"Hey, kid." she snapped her fingers, "I kind of need it as soon as possible."

[Need *it*, happy to oblige... *sigh* No, no I won't become a rapist, I'll get this treasure first, but she better be worth it.] "Ha, I'm there and back before you even know I'm gone." He bent down and started crawling through the hole.

[He is kinda cute, in a boyish sort of way, just look at the way his butt jiggles when he- aww, who am I kidding? I'll never see this kid again, the traps here are to strong for anyone to ever beat.] Nabooru sat there and sighed, "Good luck boy. You're gonna need it."

After a few minutes she found herself still thinking of that cute little butt jiggling and the slight lump she saw between them. "I bet it's four inches long," she said (not exaggerating like some other stories) She was of course comparing it to her fingers... [Ah, fingers] she touched herself [it's wet] she thought. She inserted a finger and moved it around a bit. No, she should probably save it for the boy, [the boy!] she laid down and started to pleasure herself.

Meanwhile, "Damn knight, why won't you die?!" Link was fighting a knight (or at least his armor) that was twice his size when he was grown up. Fortunately he had four bottles, all full of Blue potion.

After a while "Damn, that was a grueling battle..." he breathed heavily, "That bimbo's gonna pay in spades!" he really didn't care about being faithful at this point, he was gonna do Nabooru even if it was only to teach her not to make promises she couldn't keep.

She was really going at it, "Ohh, ohhh... Link! [or whatever his name was] just... a... little... mooree-"

Then suddenly the two witches flew in, she jumped up and pulled her pants on.

"Blue!" "Red!" they screamed as they shot their respective magic at her, but she dodged. "So, you thought you could steal our treasure young lady? Take this: Blue!" "No one steals from us, Red!" [gosh, these people fight strange] Nabooru dodged and ran outside, tripping. Before long she was covered in energy tentacles that were dragging her into a "Hell hole."

Link opened the chest, "Gloves?" he said, "Maybe they're magical." he put one on (even though it was too big) and he punched the chest. The chest flew several feet and he heard a "God Damn it all to Fucking Hell!" He looked down, he had hit the Blue witch.

"Hey, kid! Link! Run away I'm doomed! Take the treasure-" Nabooru said half way in the mini-gateway to Hell.

Without thinking Link grabbed his bow and arrow set, jumped off the cliff and fired a few ice arrows at the red one (you know the ones he had just gotten from the Gerardo training ground) [I've been meaning to try these out.] Upon contact she fell to the ground, frozen.

The blue one got up from under the broken chest and grabbed her sister, "We WILL return! AH HA HA HA HA!" she cackled as she flew off.

Link pulled on Nabooru as the portal started to close on her. "I'm not going to make it, save yourself!"

"Stop pretending to be so damn noble." he squeezed the energy tentacles until they popped, and then pulled her out (quite dramatically) just as the portal closed. They both sat there breathing heavily, Link took his gloves off and was about to lay down when he saw her humongus wet spot, [that's right. My payment] "So, what's this from?" he rubbed his hand across her pussy.

She shivered; in pleasure, pain, cold, and fear; "Um, you know... those tentacles, they.. well... did the things that tentacles do..." she wasn't sure if that would help her case any, but she had blurted it out already.

Link rubbed it the other way as he 'took his hand off' [I hope that wasn't too obvious] he saw her nipples rise a little as they pushed against the fabric.

"Well, boy... you got the treasure, and you saved my life... I guess I've got to thank you..." she squinted (between not getting to climax, naughty tentacles, and Link groping her; she was ready to do anything). She bent over him and kissed him.

[You know, with all I went through I've sort of already paid for this, I should get to be on top] Link pushed her over and into the sand. She looked puz- zled [He doesn't want sex? Then why-] Link stuck a thumb in each side of her pants and slid them down. [Oh, he wants to be on top- how'd this kid find out so much about sex?] She reached behind herself and unhooked her bra. [Oh well, at least he's bigger than Mr. Hand]

[Ahhhh, tits] he squeezed one, she moaned. [She has unusually large tits... oh, I'm a kid... I hate this, but then I've never did it as a kid before.] this started to turn him on. He had to work harder than on Malon but it seemed worth it.

"You- don't... need to- pet me, I'm ready-" Nabooru said between grunts.

[Petting?] He wasn't used to this term, but it seemed pretty self-explanatory. [So, she's all ready for me to enter her? I don't know, Malon said it was small and here I am a little boy...]

"Hurrrryy..." she screamed.

[Okay, here goes] He pulled her legs apart and pushed his manhood in a little, she moaned. He pushed in a little farther and felt something weird. "What?"

"It's my hymen, I've never had sex before... Don't tell me you've never done a virgin before." she said kinda proud to be his first virgin although she couldn't imagine what significance that held.

Link thought he remembered something like this, Mido was saying something about how it always hurt girls the first time, and blah blahhh this, blah blah that. Mido was a strange boy, all Link had said was "what are those?" pointing to a 'Nano Nymphs' center-fold hanging on his wall. Mido spent the next several hours explaining everything he knew about sex, just to sound cool. Link could only remember never to talk to him again and that girls didn't have dicks.

"Well then, this will probably hurt then..." he grabbed her rear and pushed into her with all his weight.

"AAAAAAAUUUGHHHHHHHH-" she shut her eyes tight, and clamped down on Link's back, tearing into his flesh. "It's only fair," she whispered in his ear. As the pain subsided she loosened her grip and Link knew to continue on.

"So, what's a pretty girl like you doing being a virgin?" he wasn't sure why but he thought starting a conversation would ease her up a little.

"Well, I'm not completely innocent... I do finger myself from time to time. Once I was determined to lose it to a candlestick, just to break my engagement to Gannon, but I just couldn't; I needed a real man- or maybe even a really cute little boy," she pinched his cheek, "to give it to."

"Your engaged to Gannon?!" Link yelled.

She squinted and grinned evily, "Not anymore. Now stop talking and fuck me. I want to be free from Gannon forever."

Link wasn't quite sure how sex could free anything but he wasn't about to stop. He pulled her legs up over his shoulders as he continued to pulse into her vigorously.

"Yes, yes, yes..." she said as he went, each thrust pushing her butt farther off the ground. [I never dreamed it could be this good, oh... I think it's time]

Her cum sprayed and trickled down Link's legs, [What? Why is she cumming so fast? I'm not even on edge yet!] but then he remembered that he was a kid and he thought [maybe kids can't come, then that would mean that- no I must keep trying] He picked up the pace and she moaned louder, he could feel her pleasure start to rise again. [This isn't so bad,] the thought of her cumming twice brought him up and after a few more powerful strokes they both exploded, this time together.

(LATER)

"Oh, Nabooru's home, she came back! Oh, how did you ever make it?" her family swarmed around her and asked a million questions. She proudly displayed the gloves she had stolen (she could technically say that because she had taken them from Link).

Link wondered how her family could consist only of women. [Of course now I can't pass the temple as an adult... unless I can find her in the future.] As he walked off, he knew they wouldn't see each other again for at least 7 years... which would be tomorrow-

THE END FOR NOW

WELL, WHAT DID YOU THINK? IN THE GAME SHE JUST GETS CAPTURED, *ISN'T THIS MORE FUN?* ANYWAY, IF YOUR WONDERING HOW LINK USED HIS ARROWS AS A KID, THE GLOVES GAVE HIM THE STRENGTH. AND AS FOR WEARING THE GLOVES AS A KID, LET ME JUST SAY THAT THE GAME WON'T LET YOU JUST BECAUSE IT'S NOT PROGRAMMED TO, IN REAL LIFE YOU COULD PUT THEM ON ANYWAY, EVEN IF YOU HAD TO SLIP SOMETHING ELSE IN TO BRACE IT. AND ONE FINAL ANSWER FOR ALL YOU PEOPLE FAMILIAR WITH THE SPACE TIME CONTINUUM, HOW DID LINK GET HIS ARROWS BACK IN TIME? ASK, NINTENDO... I DON'T KNOW HOW HE DOES IT BUT SOMEHOW ALL HIS STUFF COMES BACK IT TIME WITH HIM, JUST WATCH THE CONTENTS OF YOUR BOTTLES AND WALLET AND HEART CONTAINERS, ETC. ANYWAY BE HERE NEXT TIME WHEN LINK RE-EXPLORES AN OLD FRIEND ON HIS QUEST TO REGAIN HIS POWER GLOVES.


	4. Ruto Revisited

Part IV - "Ruto Revisited"  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 11-18-99

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON WRITTEN USING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN TURN BACK NOW, (AND UNLIKE CERTAIN OTHER FANFIC WRITERS, I AM OVER 18 MYSELF SO I SPEAK WITH RELATIVE AUTHORITY.) "" IS SPEECH, [] IS THOUGHT, * IS SOUND, AND **BLUE CAPS** ARE AUTHOR'S NOTES. THIS STORY TAKES PLACE AFTER MY LAST ONE WHERE LINK SAVES NABOORU AND GIVES HER THE POWER GLOVES, NOW HE HAS RETURNED TO THE FUTURE TO GET THEM BACK AND PASS THE SPIRIT TEMPLE. BUT UPON ARRIVING...

"Nabooru? No, I haven't seen her for nearly five years..."

[Apparently my saving her only lasted for two] "What happened?"

"Well, she had been fighting Gannon; not directly mind you, she went through his armies destroying as much as she could and one day she never returned." she replied.

"Hmmmm, I don't mean to be insensitive; but what happened to the gloves?" asked Link.

"Oh those old things, we stole them from one of the carpenters who said he 'found' them; we tried but we couldn't find out what had happened."

"Can I have them?" Link crossed his fingers.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha... well I couldn't just give them to you,"

[If she wants sex I'm killing her] He was not in that kind of mood, because he was kind of in a hurry though I can't imagine why.

"You're kinda cute you know," she pinched his rear, "but as the second in command I have to watch out for my people and I've been getting several complaints about the chilly winds coming from Zora's Domain. If you can stop them, I'll give you the gloves; then if you're lucky I might give you something else too..." cue the evil seductive grin.

[I suppose it's a good excuse to visit Ruto... heh-heh] "Okay, but first I'll need some proof that you've got the merchandise."

"Ya right, if I told you where they were you'd beat me up and steal them... You are stronger than everyone here... and that's why..." she was having some sort of inner struggle between her 'girls are superior' upbringing and her lust for this strapping young man.

Link had crept away the minute she hung her head down so he wouldn't get caught in the inevidble sex scene I know you wanted. *JUST WAIT A BIT*

{AT ZORA'S DOMAIN}

"Ruto, oh Ruto-chan; Ru- Oh hello.." he was interrupted by a quick little kiss. "Where did you come from?"

"Well, my mommy and daddy were-" Link face-faulted, "For a hero you sure startle easily." Ruto teased.

"HISSS!" Link pinched her and pulled away quickly like a snake (you can decide for yourself where) and she jumped back a foot.

"O.K. Okay, I give... but seriously, the Sheik said this place was supposed to thaw out now that the spell was broken, but it doesn't seem to be." I BELIEVE I'VE MENTIONED THIS BEFORE, IN THE GAME IT NEVER DOES UNFREEZE EVEN IN THE ENDING "I'm worried." she said while hugging him.

Well, after an hour or so of Din's fire, fire arrows (he had refilled his bottles with blue potion before coming), and the Megaton Hammer; he had finally gotten a big section of it chipped and melted away. He even had the bottom half of the waterfall out so he could light the mystical torches that were frozen underneath.

FAMILIAR CHIME! (ZELDA'S "YOU FOUND A SECRET" MUSIC)

"You did it!" Ruto jumped up and down.

"Not quite, I still have all of-" yet again he was interrupted with a kiss, much deeper and passionate this time.

"Listen; when Ruto, Princess of Zoras, says you're done; you're done."

[Referring to herself in third person, Eh? Kinda reminds me of when she was a little brat, 'take me here,' 'carry me,' 'Not in the water!' she was so full of herself... I never thought I would end up liking it.] "Done, Eh? Can I go home now or did you have something else in mind?"

"C'mere..." she led him into a room with a hot spring-thing-

"A hot spring!?" Link gasped.

"Yes... I know... well I'm not quite sure why, but this place has always been hotter than out there. I've been running from here to there with buckets of hot water but nothing really happened." Ruto explained.

"It just startled me, is all... so why'd you show me this?"

"Oh, don't make me say it..." she blushed a dark blue, "I haven't seen you for a while and... I was wondering..."

"That was goodbye-" her eyes sparkled like they were about to cry, "Alright," [What could I say, I'm really turned on somehow] Unbeknownst to Link it was because he was 'hot' in the literal sense, before it had always been in at night, and now in a sauna.

He hugged her and rubbed her back. [So soft, not at all slimy like you'd expect, so warm... wait she was always so cold and clammy; ah, but in a good way.] He found himself massaging her back as she kissed him. [Okay, okay... how to start; what did I do last time?] "We really... shouldn't do this.. you know... we-"

"Stop that," she looked at him sternly, "don't pretend to be all loyal to your silly princess; you've slept with at least two women since I saw you last." Link's face turned as white as-something palely-white. "Fish have the greatest sense of smell in the animal kingdom, they can even tell where water has come from by the sent. Now, I'm not a fish, but I can still smell two musky female odors on your person." Link still said nothing. "You've also come into contact with horses, bats; *sniff* a mummy, I think; an owl-"

"O.K! O.K! So put the cuffs on me, jeeshe. I just didn't want to take advantage of you that's all-" Link said.

"What about the others? Do you act all noble with them? *sniff* I think one of them was a virgin, or she may have just been bleeding at the time." When she had saw him for the first time in years (part I) she had secretly sniffed him and decided he was a virgin, she knew she was his first, and wished she was still special to him.

"I really wouldn't call it noble... and no. I suppose I tried with Malon but had to stop with her screaming..." he stopped then whispered, "commenting on how small... I was..." he took a deep breath, "And Nabooru just wanted me to take her virginity so Gannon couldn't have it- don't ask me to explain..."

She looked at him in the eye for a minute, "I will forgive you; on one condition... you must make me your concubine."

"WHAT?!"

"It means-"

"That's not what I-" a finger silenced him, he pulled it down and said, "Are you sure? I mean, you really ought to try and find someone else who'll be only for you."

"Marriage? Nah, it's too complicated... I can get everything I need from you and still have my bachlorette freedom," she grinned, "besides you're the only one worth marrying in this whole world and we aren't compatible- except for sex."

"But if you're my concubine then I'll have to..."

"Make love to me everyday?"

"No, live with you or something; and I don't think Zelda would understand," Link explained.

"I won't make you do that; but you'll have to promise you come visit me like you are today." She snuggled up against his chest, feeling his erect member pushing against her. "Are you even listening? Or does your 'little brother' just want to get this overwith?"

"Well maybe if you wouldn't tease 'him' so 'he'd be more patient."

"We can discuss this later, I won't make you be faithful to me, but unless you want Zelda to find out about your girlfriends you'll have to keep me happy." she pulled out his dick and started to massage it. "Which shouldn't be too hard with this little guy- oops (remembering his story) with this BIG guy."

[I refuse to believe that Ruto just named my dick 'BIG GUY'] his thoughts were cut abruptly short as he felt her mouth around his manhood. "Uughh..." he moaned in almost protest but soon he felt so good he-

"My, that was fast;" she said swallowing it all up, "I take it you're not used to such treatment." He wasn't at all really; it was so hot, HE was so hot. "Which means you've never tried it," she sat down and spread her legs; and stuck a finger in and wiped it around.

"I ahhh, ummm," he kneeled next to her, "I'm not quite sure what to do... umm you know..."

She grabbed his head and pulled it between her legs, "Just smell it and soon you'll be so horny you won't believe you asked me that."

He was still unsure, it was a musky odor, but somehow enticing... exotic... irresistible... he needed- something, he needed something that was inside her... deep. [I can't believe I'm doing this] He stuck his tongue in and started to lick her, faster, harder, soon she exploded all over his face.

"AAAAUUGHHH!" she was breathing heavily as she sat up, "Oh, I'm sorry Link." his face was drenched, she giggled and wiped most of it off. She looked down to see that the 'big guy' was ready for action again, "So, are you ready for the main course? I know I am." she laid back down.

Link moved over her, [I love this part] and they looked at each other saying millions of things with their eyes, yet saying nothing. Link brought himself to her entrance and slowly penetrated her until he was all the way inside. [I wish I could stay like this forever, when I'm inside I just feel so complete] But slowly he started pumping in and out of her while she started to buck her hips against his.

Ruto sighed, [I wish we could always be together, but I realize that this is the price one pays for falling in love with a hero.] She started breathing heavily again, letting out a "Hunh" every once and a while. Link picked up the pace, and so did her noises. Soon they were both climaxing and Ruto screamed out, "LIINNNKKKKK!"

"RUUTTTOOOOO!" he yelled as he buried his final thrust deep inside her. They just laid there for a while, Link's member shrinking inside her but not coming out. [I don't think I'll ever get tired of this feeling, there's something about being inside that makes all seem right in the world. I suppose I should go Back to Gerardo and-"

A kiss, the eternal interrupter, was placed on his lips; "Thank you, Link; thank you for being here for me." She held him tight.

[Well, I guess I could stay... for a while] that while ended up being the rest of the day and night. [I suppose I should wait to make sure that the place is really thawing out, too.]

The next morning Link woke up alone, [That's odd, I didn't think she was that kind of girl] he got up and dressed. As he exited he saw that the Zoras were all out there swimming and playing in the... WATER!

"Oh, Link! Come here!" Ruto waved from the lake, "Hey everyone, remember Link? He's the one who saved me seven years ago from Jabu-Jabu; and he got the torches lit again to thaw this place out again."

"Was that before or after you slept with him?" someone yelled out.

Link blushed, he hated being the center of attention, especially when it was making him look like a pervert. "It's not like that!" he protested.

"I'm sorry, Link; I tried to wash the sent off but they've been teasing me all morning, it's not your fault." she kissed him, "They're just a bit giddy from being frozen; it'll pass."

Link said goodbye and that he hopped things would get back to normal, i.e. they would stop "wooo"ing and whistling and hollering every time Ruto kissed him, she seems to do that a lot.

Once outside he called Epona and rode off to Gerardo.

TO BE CONTINUED...

AND SO ENDS ANOTHER STORY, THIS TIME ON A HAPPIER NOTE. IN THE FIRST ONE, YOU'LL REMEMBER I MENTIONED THAT MOST PEOPLE DON'T START OUT HARD-CORE- PORNER-VIRGINS AND NEED SOME TIME TO GROW, WELL THROUGH A LITTLE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT THEY ARE NOW SUCKING AND FUCKING (^_^ BAD PHRASE). NEXT TIME YOU WILL FIND LINK GETTING HIS GLOVES, PASSING THE TEMPLE AND... YES HAVING SEX, (THE REASON BEHIND ALL LEMON FANFICS) BUT I WON'T TELL YOU WHO WITH. ANYWAY, WHEN YOU E-MAIL ME REMEMBER ALL THE _'S BECAUSE WITHOUT THEM YOU GET SOMEONE ELSE ENTIRELY. I HOPE TO GET A RESPONSE SOON.


	5. Two Faries and an Elf

Part V - "Two Faries and an Elf"  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 11-29-99

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON WRITTEN USING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN TURN BACK NOW, (AND UNLIKE CERTAIN OTHER FANFIC WRITERS, I AM OVER 18 MYSELF SO I SPEAK WITH RELATIVE AUTHORITY.) AS FOR THE TITLE IT'S PRETTY STRAIGHTFORWARD, IN THIS FANFIC LINK WILL FUFIL MY LOLITA COMPLEX. ANYWAY, "" IS SPEECH, [] IS THOUGHT, * IS SOUND, AND **BLUE CAPS** ARE AUTHOR'S NOTES. THIS STORY TAKES PLACE AFTER MY LAST ONE, LINK IS NOW RETURNING TO GERARDO TO RECIEVE HIS GLOVES.

"No, I really must be going..." Link was trying to be polite as he struggled to keep the girls out of his tunic. "Let go of that!"

"I'm sorry, it's just that since you defeated us all we all are supposed to have you're children so the next generation will be stronger; it's been going on since... forever. Although usually a man only defeats a couple of women, so it's easier for him to handle it." said the second in command who, like everyone else, really just wanted him for herself.

"Then what good is an orgy?" he pushed a few girls off of himself, "If it's really for the kids then shouldn't you wait till your period or whatever?"

"Well, you see..." she trailed off; "these are the girls who are obulating, the rest are at their posts waiting their turn."

[I'm not ready for that! I still feel guilty with Ruto! Well, I hoped it wouldn't come to this] he lept up, grabed the gloves and as he left he shouted: "If you think I'm that kind of guy-"

"You are and we have proof!" they shouted holding up a little girl named Kasuto (the only town from Zelda II who doesn't have a character named after it) "She's Nabooru's daughter, you know."

Link just grabbed his Ocarina and warped to the Spirit Temple.

Now this disturbed Link, they could be lying but then again he HAD done Nabooru and she was from a cult of girls who could somehow only produce females... [I guess that answers my question about he family being all girls. Of coarse now I can never go near Gerardo again. Man, I can't belive this; here I am with an entire tribe of beautiful, sexy women after me and I don't want them? Of coarse I do. Don't I?] he thought about this while he did the Spirit Temple.

Soon he had destroyed another giant knight, only this time the armour wasn't empty. "LINK?!"

"Nabooru?"

The witches apeared and stole her "BLUE!" "RED!"

"Will you cut that out?!"

BIG FIGHT SCEEN, WHEN DEFEATED THEY MORPH INTO ONE AND FIGHT SOME MORE, LINK KILLS THEM, THEY ARGUE AS THEIR SPIRITS FADE; NABOORU IS FREED. SHE GIVES BIG SPEECH ABOUT BEING A SAGE AND GIVES LINK A MEDALION.

Link warps back to the forrest (even though you can't) and goes to his house. He flops on his bed and tries to sleep but he still can't stop thinking about all those women and how he hasn't had sex since last night.

His thinking is interupted by "Link."

"Wha.."

"It's only me Link." Navi said, as Link sat up "Link, I wanted to say... that I know how you must feel."

"How?"

Navi blushed, "Well, I know how pretty those girls are and how hard you try to stay focused and... well I just wanted to know if I could help you in any way."

"I don't think you can. Not unless you can impregnate a few hundred women," Link chuckled.

"NO! That's not what I meant! I... just... came to releive your tension." she disrobed "I know I'm small, but all I have is yours for the taking." Link didn't move so she flew up to his lips and kissed him.

Just then Saria came in, "Oh, I'm sorry... did you want to be alone?"

"Saria! It's not what you think! It is! It isn't!" Link studdered.

"Oh, ho..." she tilted her head up and smirked, "Navi, you horny little bastard. If anyone is going to fuck Link, it should be me."

This was a side to Saria Link had never seen "Ummm..."

"I'm 26 years old you know, just because I look 8 dosen't make me naieve."

"TWENTY-SIX?! But I'm only 17, and-" [I keep forgetting she's not a little girl even though she is]

"It's not me," Navi interupted, "Link has done several people, and it's my turn!"

[Oh hell] Link thought.

Sprite (Saria's farie) flew between the girls and said, "Come on, I'm sure we can share." she went on explaining the orgies she and Saria had had in the past.

[What the hell, at least I'm among friends] Link thought "So, how do faries, well... you know?"

After some instructions followed by a demonstration Saria passed the dildo (which was the size of a Q-tip) over to Link. "Okay, are you ready?"

"Please be gental." Navi said as she closed her eyes. Link held her down against his leg gently with one finger and rubbed her breasts with it, with the other hand he pushed the dildo into her lovebox slowly. "Ooohhhhh..." Navi moaned. Link pushed in further and it stopped.

"Don't tell me you're a virgin too." Link felt bad with virgins because he wasn't one himself and it made him feel evil.

"Link, I love you; I've always loved you, I've saved myself for you. Of course I have to admit, I wanted to do it the other way but all the guys hate me." Navi sniffed, "Here." she grabbed it and pulled back, "Aaaah!" she arched her back up and fluttered her wings and basically contorted alot. "Oh, ouch! Ah my ow..." she calmed down and Link pinched her (which was a gentle hug on her end [being small and all]) "I'm ready."

Link set her down gently and resumed. Soon she was moaning again as he pushed harder and faster. She gripped the sides of his leg as he probed her cunt. Soon she opted to change possitions, now she had he face against his leg while her butt wiggled back and forth in the air with each thrust. "Oh, I'm gonna," she gripped his leg and bit his stockings as her warm honey spewed out onto Link. She laid down and resumed normal breathing.

Link had the biggest boner you ever saw, it swelled up so much that it felt like it would burst. Link pulled it out and started to jack-off (he didn't want to but he couldn't seem to do anything else. Saria, who was also masterbating, looked up and said: "Oh, don't do that." (like she has the right to talk) "do me!" She bent down as Link grabbed her ass cheeks and plunged himself into her comming imediately. Sending a shockwave of pleasure through her as she came too.

"Whoa! That's something... they're not gonna believe... we came on the first drive," Saria panted.

"Who?" Link didn't like other people knowing about these things.

"Never mind; no one-"

Saria was cut off by Navi who walked up to Link's dick and started licking it therby cuting his attension off. "Mmmm, ohhh, so this is what Ruto was tasting..." and she liked it.

[Oh, that feels good] Link thought [Man she sure is good for someone so small] Link saw Sprite licking out of Saria which caused his organ to swell back to it's full size.

Navi licked around the rim gently hugging the shaft and masaging it with her arms. She rubbed her chest and body in small circles while pressed against his member and she even got her hips into it. Finally she burried her cute little head in the opening. (Not literally mind you, she's not *that* small; the hole is about the same size as her mouth.)

Link moaned, [man this feels good! If I had known a fairy could do so much I'd... well, do her everyday; that's what I'd do.] He wanted to help somehow but she was covering his dick so he couldn't touch it and her privates were pressed up against it. [I know.] Link grabbed the Q-tip-sized-dildo and sliped it between her legs.

"Mmmm... oh," she spread them a little and arched off his member just enough for it to get in. "Ahhh," she grunted.

With her proximity to his manhood, the licking, and his thrusting into her Link was almost at his peek. "I'm goona cum." he said, warning Navi.

"Me too... ugh ugh ugh uuuggghhhhaaaaaaaa!" her jucies sprayed on Link's hand and onto his balls which sent him over. His ejaculation knocked Navi off and she landed a foot away covered in his fluids. Sprite was there too, covered in Saria's cum.

As the two faries 'cleaned' each other Saria caught her breath and said "I hope your're not tired." She walked over and sat on his chest, bending over to kiss him.

"I don't know, I've never gone three times in a row..."

"Come on, please. The last time was too short."

(Link hated to disobey such a cute little girl.) "I'll try." With a few kisses (in various places) he was ready again. He stood her up and asked, "So, how do you want it?" (before had been so spontaneous that he wasn't sure what the best posistion would be for someone her size.)

She sat on the side of the bed and posistioned him in front of her telling him to lean in but not to put too much weight on her. "Okay," she said grabbing his arms as he slowly pushed in. "Agh!"

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, it went by so fast last time; I didn't realize how big it was." [I truley am in for a good fuck!] Saria thought.

Link smiled, Malon seemed to be the odd one out; everyone else liked him (of course he was twice Saria's size). Once he had pushed it all the way in, he pulled out a bit and then plunged back into her tight box. Saria was wobbling back and forth so she had to grab the bed to try to stablize herself. It felt so good that she had cum three times by the time Link had.

Saria was so tired (and sore) that she couldn't stand up so she curled up next to Link and hugged him. "Thanks Link, you don't know how much it means to me for you to be here and fuck my brains out."

"You know, you really don't have to say it that often. F this, F that; what are you, some kind of shock-jock?" Link used the term that wouldn't be invented for centuries.

"I'm sorry, it's just... just so big! If that blonde that used to flirt with you knew-" Link silenced her with a finger.

"Let's not ruin this night," he gave her a small kiss, "I have a lot to do tomorrow and should get my rest." And so they sat there in each others' arms untill the next day.

TO BE CONTINUED LATER... WELL, I'M REALLY NOT QUITE SURE WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT. MY 'CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT' SEEMS TO HAVE GONE TOO FAR AS HE DOES THREE WOMEN AT ONCE NOW. ANYWAY THE REAL PROBLEM IS: WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A ENCORE? ANYWAY, THE NEXT FANFIC WILL PROBABLY BE MY LAST FOR THIS SERIES. ALL HE NEEDS TO DO IS PASS THE LAST TEMPLE, FIND OUT SHEIK IS ZELDA, AND THEN... HA HA HA HA HA! SO SEND IDEAS, COMMENTS, AND OTHER STUFF TO THE ADDRESS ON THE TITLE.


	6. Zelda, Oh My Zelda

Part VI - "Zelda, Oh My Zelda"  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 2-3/28-00

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON WRITTEN USING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN TURN BACK NOW, (AND UNLIKE CERTAIN OTHER FANFIC WRITERS, I AM OVER 18 MYSELF SO I SPEAK WITH RELATIVE AUTHORITY.) IS THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER IN THE SERIES? IT DOESN'T REALLY END (IT'S NOT AS BAD AS THE REAL GAME'S ENDING. IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT, READ THE COMMENTS AT THE END). OUR STORY OPENS WITH LINK HAVING JUST ESCAPED FROM GANNON'S FALLING TOWER AND GOING BACK TO STAB HIM IN THE HEAD WITH THE MASTER SWORD.

"SEAL HIM FOREVER?!" Link yelled "I just killed him!"

"No, Gannon's power is great... by destroying his body you have only bought us some time to contain him." Zelda called upon the power of the sages and they all got close-ups and condensed their power into the abyss to seal Gannon.

"AAAARRRRGGGGG! I HATE YOU Link! A THOUSAND CURSES! I VOW TO ESCAPE FROM HERE AND KILL YOU! EVEN IF IT TAKES A THOUSAND, THOUSAND, THOUSAND YEARS! I WILL NOT REST UNTIL YOU, THE PRINCESS AND ALL OF YOUR DESCENDANTS ARE DEAD! THUS SAYITH THE GREAT GANNONDORF! I WILL DESTROY YOUR HAPPINESS NO MATTER WHAT THE COST!" he screamed as he spun away into the abyss. Later...

"This is not your time continuum. I must send you back to your own time so that you may live your life normally." Zelda fought a tear as she lifted the Ocarina to her lips-

Link pulled her hand down, "Wait, what about us?"

"You never loved me, you just felt it was our destiny to be together; otherwise you would have saved yourself for me." Zelda cried.

"I tried... I'm just not very good, at it..." Link replied.

"From what I hear you're very good at *it*, except for Malon" Link winced when she said that. [Now that's hitting below the belt] Zelda thought "I know, I know, it's hard because you're just so sexy."

"I didn't say that."

"I know, but anyways you are still a kid at heart; you need to live a normal kid's life, you can't miss a single day or you'll regret it for the rest of your life." Zelda said.

"This is about you isn't it? I know how hard it must have been living in a world that Gannon ruled. But that's over now, we can keep the past behind us." Link said

"Yes, I suppose it's about my lost youth... but trust me you don't know how hard it is knowing that you can't go back. All I can do is offer myself to you as going away present, allthough that will probably just make things harder." Zelda blushed slightly.

"It's not like I can go back to being a naive child, even if I go back I'll still act the same as I do now. I, I love you... you're the one I've been waiting for; well sorta waited; I can't just have a one-night stand and then go back to being a kid. I mean it will be too weird living with you, knowing how you look naked and not, well you know." Link said then thought about something, "Hey wait, we imprisoned Gannon here in the future... er-present, so going into the past would be like starting this all over again." Link explained.

"I'm sorry, but that is the way it must be. But without the time-gate open I'm hoping that he won't obtain as much power and we can stop him. (In the game they never mention this even though Zelda's still looking at him through the window at the end)" Zelda replied.

"Well, at least you have a plan, of sorts. But how do you know I won't loose myself and just tear into you one day and ummm, fuck your brains out... or whatever; I'm not made of stone you know. Also, back then you just saw me as the hero, what if you find someone else."

"Think of it as your second chance, I'll send you back before Nabooru and we'll just have to see if you can save yourself this time. As for my feelings... I have a slight confession to make... when I told you about my dream... I sorta, left out part." Link had a blank stare as Zelda continued, "You see he didn't just save the kingdom, he... -" but she couldn't finish and she put her hands on her face and blushed profusely.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, don't make me say it... little girls are supposed to be so naive... it's so imbaressing- I can't belive I'm telling you this." Zelda turned away from him.

"Why not? I think it's kinda cute... I never would have thought girls were like that, it makes me feel better." Link said holding her close and starting to undo her dress.

"No wait, I can't!" she pushed him away slightly, "I'm just too embarrased!" Zelda hid her face again.

Link kissed her neck, "You shouldn't be. You're the most beautiful woman I know."

"It's not that... it's just that I've never done it when you were awake before, I-" Zelda's eyes turned into little dots.

"?!"

"I HAVE TO GO!" Zelda spun around and ran away.

Link chased her until he got to the broken draw-bridge. Zelda was sitting by it crying. "What's wrong?"

"You know damn well what's wrong!" Zelda turned to him with a tear-soaked and very mean-spirited face. "I don't want to talk about it okay?"

"There's not really much we can do about that now." Link said, "I mean I have so many questions..." Link thought for a second, "You might say I'm so curious it arouses me."

"That's a really stupid thing to say, baka!" she smiled, "But at least you tried."

"So... is there any place left were we can talk in private?" he asked.

"There is one place... sheik's house... it hidden from every one, even Impa."

"Oh, that's right you're Sheik..." Link blushed, "I forgot already, boy you are creepy..." he caught himself, "I mean, not you; it's just Sheik had a crush on me (I think) and he was a guy (I thought) and-"

Later at sheik's house... (BTW the signs are supposed to signify italics because Zelda is talking about herself in 3rd person, using an alias, so I had to signify it somehow.)

"So what's it like?"

"Well," she blushed, "It all started about a year ago when I decided to take a peek at your... um, goods-" Link looked puzzeled, "Oh yes, for six years you had been floating in an electric-ball-looking-thing. Gannon never did anything because he thought he had contained you. For years I just came and talked to you about my problems (you were such a good listener), but one day I used my power to take you out and kissed you. ... And I couldn't stop. It was platonic at first, (well, maybe more) but I wasn't intending to do anything else. Finally I just couldn't help myself."

"So, my body just functioned normally?"

"No, it was tough getting you hard; you didn't cum for the longest time. Of coarse neither did I, the first few times I would just sit there with you inside me. I'd bob up and down sometimes, but just being with you sempt so wonderful. I can't remember when, but one day I was going rather hard and I felt strange so I went harder and finially came vigorously. I was so scared that day, I had to clean you off so no one would know. I didn't visit again for about a week. Untill I couldn't stand it anymore."

"Oh, Zelda..." Link held her close, "If I had only known..." "you're the one who made me perverted."

"What?"

"Well, I couldn't figure out why the girls had gotten so much more attractive even Saria and Fado who still look the same. (Fado is Mido's sister [they're both named after musical notes] and she is "the blond girl who used to flirt with Link" I mentioned last time.) It seems my body had grown tremendously lustful from years of something, I just didn't know what."

"Oh, come on it's not like you never invisioned girls naked as a kid. Plus you would have been perverted anyway, everyone is deep down inside. With guys it's girls, and with girls it's usually the man she loves. Anyway, it's not like you ever came inside me. It wasn't untill about a month ago that I started going two or three times that I felt you twitch so I jumped off as you squirted into the air. Ever since then I've been careful to stop just before you go so there was no chance of pregnancy."

[Funny, no one else seemed to worry, except thoes Gerardos] "Okay, let's drop the who's fault="" bit, are you ready to take me now?"

"Yes, now that Gannon's gone I can go back to being a girl and not worry about blowing my disguise." she took off her dress and laid it gently on the back of a chair. She sat on the bed and said "Please be gentle, let's at least act like virgins... I'm still really nervous about this, it's like I'm being graded now."

Link couldn't remember how a virgin would start, but he knew a little 'petting' would calm her down (and excite her). Link sat down next to her and took her onto his lap, "Are you sure you want this?" he asked as he fingered her, slightly rubbing her clit.

"Yes," she blushed, "Ahhhh, yes." Zelda closed her eyes; she was so scared that she wouldn't be able to please him as well as the others, but all that seemed to fade away as he continued his ministrations. [Even if I'm not the best, I still want to give my love to him... to feel him inside of me... to have him on top of me... I-] "Uuuaagh!" she came.

[Whoah, I knew I was good, but I'm not that good] "Zelda..." he sighed.

"Wow! It's never been that good. It feels so much better when someone else is touching you. Link... come to me... don't make me wait any longer. I need you inside of me, on top of me." Zelda said.

"Okay," Link layed her down and got ontop, "I'm not too heavy am I? You know I'd never do anything to hurt you."

"No... all the pain is gone, Gannon's destroyed, Hyrule is safe, and your warmth against me is so good I almost don't want to send you back." Zelda said.

"Then why-"

"You know." Zelda paused then added "Maybe I'm come with you." She could feel Link's member jump at this, "Letcher!" she said. "Anyway, we can discuss that later; now we need to conciously consumate our companionship."

Link didn't quite understand that last sentance (I actually didn't use a thesaurous, I just happened to know three "c" words) but he knew what she wanted. He positioned himself at her entrance and slowly pushed in [!? She's a bit looser than the others...] Link thought [Oh wait, I've probably stretched her out from the time when I was asleep] Zelda sorta made a cute frowny-face when Link pulled out, then kinda smilied when he pushed back in. [She has the cutest little expressions. Zelda, oh my Zelda; I just wish we could always be together.] He started rocking his hips faster, not jerking them, but almost smoothly as they swayed.

[Oh, my he's good! Oh I feel so warm... I'm about to cum again, but I don't want this to stop.] But she could feel him twitching inside of her, [He's about ready too, should I go first or wait for him? Oh, I just don't know, Oh, I] she grabbed him and locked her fingers behind his back, wispering "I love you."

"I love you too." Link replied, thrusting harder until they both felt an orgasm spread over them and they spilled onto each other.

Zelda had had cum gush down her legs before, but the feeling inside of her was more than she could bear. She dug her nails into him and came once more holding him so close he could bearly breathe. She let him go and blushed.

"Whooa." Link pulled out and layed beside her.

"Link?"

"Yes?"

"Have you ever 'plugged' someone in the ass?"

"What!?"

"Have you?"

"No, ... why?"

"I just wanted you to do something that you hadn't before to make up for lost virginity, and I'm virgin to that kind of treatment." Zelda said.

"Are you sure? I heard it was much tighter and the skin tears at first." Link said.

"Yes, just like a virgin."

"You don't have to, I wasn't either..." Link's sentace was cut short when a pair of lips surrounded his cock and brought him back to hardness.

"Please?" she looked up at him with the cutest eyes she could.

"Okay..." Link said and she turned around and got on all fours. (This reminded him of Malon but he didn't care right now) he stuck a finger in and felt around [it's small and kinda dry... I'd better coat it first] he stuck himself into her womanhood again and lathered himself up, taking a little in his hands to spread at the entrance. [Well, here goes.]

At about half-way in Zelda let out a moan so Link continued "Oh, yes! Fill me with your manhood, don't stop!" As he continued she moaned louder and louder.

[It's so tight! I can already feel myself building up, I can't imagine what she feels though. Oh Zelda, you don't know how happy I am right now.]

[Yes, I do.] Zelda thought as a final thrust hit home. They laid there next to each other for quite some time untill, "So, how many times do you go in a night?"

"You can't be serious!" her expression said she was, "The most I've ever done before is three."

"Well," she smillied seductivly, "we'll just have to fix that..."

THE END

WELL, WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN? DOES LINK GO BACK? DO THEY DEFEAT GANNON IN THE PAST? I HAVE DECIDED THAT SUCH QUESTIONS CAN WAIT. IN THE GAME HE GOES BACK AND IT ENDS WHEN HE AND ZELDA MEET. FOR NOW I AM GOING TO MOVE ON TO OTHER ZELDA GAMES AND BY THE TIME I'M DONE IF THE SEQUEL ISN'T OUT THEN I'LL START THIS STORY BACK UP AGAIN AND JUST WING IT. BUT TAKE HEART, YOU KNOW EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT, RIGHT? I MEAN ZELDA 3'S THE ONLY GAME WHERE THEY DON'T GET TOGETHER AT THE END, ANYWAY YOU'LL HAVE LINK'S OTHER INCARNATIONS TO WORY ABOUT. E-MAIL ME AT THE ADDRESS ON THE TITLE PAGE.


	7. You're a Zelda!

Part VII - "You're a Zelda!"  
_(pronounced yer ah, not yor aye)_  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 9-26-00

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON WRITTEN USING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN TURN BACK NOW, (AND UNLIKE CERTAIN OTHER FANFIC WRITERS, I AM OVER 18 MYSELF SO I SPEAK WITH RELATIVE AUTHORITY.) WELL IT'S BEEN ABOUT SIX MONTHS SINCE THE LAST PART OF THE SERIES (IT'S ALSO THREE WEEKS UNTIL ITS ANNIVERSARY), AND THE NEXT GAME IS COMING UP NEXT MONTH SO I DECIDED TO WRITE A STORY TO BRIDGE THE GAP. I DECIDED TO BASE IT ON THE 64DD VERSION OF ZELDA THEY NEVER RELASED (TENTATIVLY CALLED "URA ZELDA" _NOW THE TITLE MAKES SENSE!_), WHICH SUPPOSEDLY HAD A NEW LIGHT TEMPLE, SOLVED SOME OF THE GAMES PROBLEMS, AND YOU GET THE TRIFORCE (TO FILL THE EMPTY ONE ON YOUR STAUS SCREEN). THIS AND LOTS OF SPECULATION, THINGS SAID AT ZELDA CLUBS, AND FANFICS, HAVE ALL INSPIRED A NEW STORY THAT GETS LINK FROM WHERE I LEFT HIM TO A PLACE WHERE THE SKULL KID CAN GET HIM AND START THE NEXT SERIES (WHICH WILL NOT HAVE A NEW NAME, I'M JUST CONTINUING ON WITH "THE HENTAI OF TIME" UNTIL LINK HAS ANOTHER INCARNATION).

Link fell out of bed, "Ouch... what the? Where am I?" he looked around, "That little bitch!" he was in his own room and a kid. "I can't believe she sent me back when I was asleep, and after I gave her the best night of my life." He thought for a minute [I could go sleep with Saria or Fado, teach her a lesson... or should I wait for her and do things right this time?]

Navi flew through the door, "Hey! Wake up- oh, you're awake... already? I thought you'd be asleep for some reason, I'm-"

"Navi? What were you doing out there?" Link asked.

"How do you know me already?" she asked.

Suddenly Link realized what had happened, he checked his stuff; it was all gone. "No! She took everything!"

~No she didn't, when the door of time closed everything reset to before this started.~

"Who said that?" asked Link and Navi together, looking around.

~I am Impa of the Seikah, I am using my telepathy to contact you from across the void; you must listen to me, when Zelda put you back in your own time she set off a chain reaction that made all the Sages' travel back too, Gannondorf also maintains his memories but I cast a spell that made him think it was just a vission of things to come. You must listen to me, Gannondorf's first move is when you open the Door of Time, you must not do that, do not even collect the stones.~

"Are we just gonna let Gannon run free? How do I defeat him?"

"Um, what's going on?" Navi asked.

~If we can keep the gate closed for seven years then you will be old enough to run in and grab it without being sealed away. Then you can defeat him before he has the Triforce of Power, in fact you would have all three of the Triforces helping you. Unarmed with Immortality, Gannon will finally be destroyed and not need to be sealed away.~

Navi's eyes turned into dots and she tilted her head to the side, "Um, does anybody want to fill me in on what's going on?"

"BUT WHAT ABOUT THE DEKU TREE?!" Saria came in through the door, "If Link doesn't defeat all the monsters in it he'll die and Gannon will get the gem anyway!"

~I am well aware of that, but if Link collects the stones again-~

"STONE! SINGULAR! LESS THAN THREE!" Saria yelled.

~I'm afraid if Link gets one right away, then waits for seven years Gannondorf will get very suspisious. I supose there is one way to solve this, but you must take a week to pass it and complain about how hard it is to Mido so Gannondorf will think you are incompetent.~

"Mido is working for Ganno?!" Link and Saria screamed.

"Um, -" Navi started but Sprite (Saria's fairy) pulled her to the side and explained the whole future thing as well as she could (she heard it from Saria).

~No, but I do not know where Gannondorf's spies are and Mido will no doubt spread the word to everybody because he likes gossip and making you look stupid.~

"Well, thanks." Link said, "So the plan is look stupid and wait..." he sighed, "I think I'll kill my self." he was going to put his sword against his belly (sepuku) jokingly, but he didn't have it.

"Come on it's not that bad, we can get the sword tomorrow; but for now-" Saria rubbed what little she had to offer against Link's back as she hugged him and started moving her hand down toward his goods.

~No, no, no; there'll be none of that! Link is a little kid now, and Zelda wishes him to live like one.~

**I COULD GO ON WITH THE STUPID EXPLINATIONS FOREVER, BUT BASICALLY LINK DOESN'T LEAVE THE FORREST FOR A MONTH; AND WHEN HE DOES A LOT OF STUFF HAPPENS AND WE REJOIN HIM AT KAKARIKO VILLIAGE**

"Again?" Link asked.

"Yes."

He breathed out a puff of air, "Okay, but this is the last time."

"Thank you."

"We have to do something about you girl." Link left to go fetch the lady's 'cuccus' again (what did you think was happening?)

As Link ran around town to the same spots as last time and came back to throw them in she thought: [girl... I haven't been called anything but 'the cuccu lady' for years.] She looked around, [Hmmm, one short; where's Link?] she looked around some more and as she turned to the graveyard, Link fluttered down with the last cuccu. She turned around seeing this dramatic shot with the lens glare and triumphent music: DA-DATTLY-DA-DA-DONTTELY-DA! (music doesn't work as well when typing) and he gracefully touched the ground and set the cuccu down.

"Don't cheer, don't applaud, just throw money." Link joked, bowing. She obviously wasn't listening because she was clapping and cheering. "Anyway, I can't be here every day to round up these critters, you really ought to extend the fence or get their wings clipped."

She just smiled.

Several hours later Link had finnished doubling the fence's height (with the pile of wood sitting there) and clipping the cuucu's wings (which took quite a while because they kept summoning the flock to kill him). He wiped the sweat from his forehead, "Whew, I'm glad I don't have to do that every day."

She was a little short on cash and she knew a 20 wouldn't pay for what he did, so she offered him dinner and a place to stay for the night. Link agreed, he hadn't eaten a decent meal since Talon threw that Super Cucccu party.

-Flashback 1-

Talon killed the fattened pig and made Cantonese Sweet-and-Sour Pork, wich Link thought might have been an overkill since all he did was find the 'Super' cuccus in a flock of normal ones. After drinking too much milk he asked Link to marry Malon, wich Link declined this time because he already had a girlfriend named Zelda. [She said something about that, right? The whole horse rape thing... what was it? Oh, wait... it was just somene to think about while masterbating... I'll have to think of another way to save her.] Link thought, [I guess I won't have to worry for a couple years.]

-end Flashback 1-

"This is quite tasty." Link said. She had served him Beef-with-Broccoli and a small glass of wine. Link tried to say something but she insisted that it would aide the digestion and help him sleep tonight.

"Thanks, I don't normally get to cook for people because I'm not married." [There's something odd about this kid... he's smart, strong, can hold his wine, and he eats broccoli. He doesn't call me or (in Japan kids normally adress people this way), he acts like I'm his age. Those clothes... he must be a korikian adult, the poor race doomed to spend eternity in children's bodies.] "I mean I don't have a husband to cook for... did I sound desperate?"

"Wha?" Link wasn't paying attention, and the pause between had thrown him off. But he heard the word desperate so he said, "Everybody feels desperate at some point in time. For instance I have this girlfriend who's about my heigth, but I have to wait for her to turn 18, and I have to wait outside the forrest so I'll get taller too."

[I was right!] "That must be hard,... the waiting I mean. How do you get by?" she asked.

[By masterbating, mostly] "Um, well... you know;" he thought for a moment, "I don't." He looked her over, she had red hair and blue eyes; she wore a dark blue dress with a white top and sash. She also wore a brown vest which had several chicken scratches and the glisten of dried snot in places (she's allergic to chickens, I mean cuccus, remember?) Link had finnished his dinner, [You know she is kinda hot, except for the snot-stains. But you can't really blame her, in a way I admire her courage for raising them even though she shouldn't. Link was getting aroused, [It's been two months since I came back and I've been faithful, I can surpress this.]

But by faithful he meant he had not had sex with anybody. He had jacked-off numerous times and just last week he was so hard up that he:

-Flashback 2-

[Man, I can't stand it. Impa and Zelda are keeping tabs on every one of my girls, I can't even massage them; I really miss the feeling of their...] Link needed release again. He walked into a building he thought was empty, he pulled of his boxers (or whatever he wears under his tunic [no body-sock, stockings as a kid]) and started wanking, but then he realized that he wasn't alone. He stopped dead in his tracks, "Sorry! I can explain! Really! Please let me explain! I have an explination! _And it's a good explination too!_ Why won't you let me explain?!" Link was just biding his time, he really had no idea what to say. But when the girl didn't say anything he walked over, [she's asleep, I'm saved! Gosh it must be hard to sleep sitting up, and with some dickhead screaming like this.]

He stood on the table and poked her a few times. He noticed his little brother was really close to her head, he thought about face-fucking her [yeah suck it bitch! Ha-ha-ha-ha!] Ever since he had heard how Zelda had done his sleeping body (part 6) Link had developed a slight case of necrophilia, or at least he wanted to try an unconscious woman. [Of course sucking would either choke her or wake her up.] Link pushed her back and looked at her as she layed against the back of her chair. She had dark blue hair and a pink & purple tiedie shirt wich wasn't long enough so her belly showed. Link pulled it up and looked at her chest; he'd seen bigger, and he'd seen smaller. [I can't believe I'm just looking at her like this, I don't know what I'd do if she woke up.]

Link calmly stared at her for the next hour observing and feeling up her goodies because he knew this was his only chance for a long time. He would jack-off with his free hand and eventually came, causing a mess down her frontside. He cleaned it up as best he could, [I can't believe I squirted that much, I must have really missed breasts.] he put her shirt back on and sat her back up trying to get her in the position he had found her in. He felt guilty so he put a yellow ruppee (200) in her register, and kissed her good-bye. He turned to leave and when he opened the door her hand slipped from her chin, causing her to hit her head on the table.

"Oh, ouch! What the? A customer! Welcome to the Bombachu Bowling alley, how my I help you?" she said smiling.

-end Flashback 2-

[That really was a terrible thing to do, wasn't it?] Link thought to himself, [At least I played it 10 times and got a bigger bomb bag; it still doesn't excuse what I did though. ...she had the most beautiful green eyes when she woke up, I sometimes wish I had done more.] Link had spent half the night thinking about how he wasn't going to have sex with the woman he was staying with, and he was terribly horny. He turned to the side and bumped into her, "How long have you been here?" Link covered his mouth [did I just say that out loud?!].

"I lied when I said this was the guest bed, it's mine; it's the only bed in fact." she replied.

"But why?"

"I thought you'd want to sleep on the floor if you knew that. And I slipped in because I couldn't get to sleep in the other room."

"You mean you're trying to seduce me."

"Did it work? I don't know, I need practice. Some day I'm gonna need a husband or I'll go crazy."

"But I'm-"

"Not you, I've already got someone in mind, but I'm not a virgin so I need to make up with it by being good at *it*." she blushed.

Link wasn't going to ask who or what the reason was but he felt sorry for her. He knew that a girl's hymen was a symbol of everything special they kept for marriage, and in the Sheikiah religion it wasn't allowed to be even touched until they were 18 (that's why he and Zelda weren't at it like weasels). It was something about not getting her full powers and hunting devils or something... (Devil Hunter Yohko). "Well, your only problem is your snot. I could get you some nasal spray from the Lake Hylia guy."

"Really? Other than that am I desireable?" she smilied.

"Yeah, you're beautiful and all; in fact I don't even mind the snot, I think it's kind of sexy. But other people may not think so, I think I just like women too much." Link said. (Of course she wasn't snotty now, and she was wearing a frilly night-gown instead of her daywear.)

She fliped up Link's tunic, and pulled out his penis. She started licking it and put it into her mouth. Soon Link was hard and she began bobbing her head up and down on it.

[Whoa, man she's good! I guess no one can blame me for a quick blowie.] Link held her head against himself forcing more and more into her mouth. Suddenly he exploded into her. "Man, that was good... I've really missed it." he said aloud.

"There's more." she said holding up her nightie showing that she wasn't wearing any panties. She sat on Link's still erect member and moaned. Soon she was bobbing up and down, impaling herself on his shlong.

[It feels so much better than I remember it! I'm going to cum soon, but I'd better not. If Zelda finds out...] Link held on for as long as he could but finally let go with his longest orgasm ever. [Ah, sweet release! I can't imagine ever living without this.] Link relaxed and went soft.

"Well, how was it? Was it good for you? I still have a lot to learn, but what do you think needs the most improving?" she asked.

"I don't know... you could try being less bold. Someone might think you're a slut or something... no offense." Link stated.

"Oh, that's good; I never thought of that, anyway you don't have to keep calling me the cuccu lady, I have a name you know; it's-" but Link was already asleep. [Hmm, I guess I'll tell him in the morning. He's so cute.] Link was laying on his back drooling as he snored. She pulled the sheets over them and fell asleep herself.

The next morning Link awoke with a start, [OH NO! Zelda's gonna kill me! I've gone this long without betraying her, and now I do this... this woman I don't even know!] Link grabbed his things and left running. He ran all day and stopped in the middle of a forrest somewhere, [I think I over reacted. All I have to do is take a bath then not act like anything ever happened, yeah. But now that I remember how good it is, how can I live without it?] He saw Epona grasing nearby [I wonder what she's doing here?] So Link sat against a tree and thought.

In nearby bushes a skull-kid possesed by Majora's Mask looked at him...

SEE YOU NEXT MONTH!

WELL... WHAT DID YOU THINK? I WAS PLAYING THROUGH THE GAME AGAIN AND I NOTICED HOW MUCH DETAIL GOES INTO THESE EXTRAS. THE TWO IN THIS STORY ARE MY FAVORITE, THE LAST ONE I USED WAS FADO AND BEFORE THAT WAS THE SECOND IN COMMAND GERARDO (THE ONE YOU FIGHT AND WEARS THE SAME COLOR AS YOU). ANYWAY, I NEEDED A REASON FOR LINK TO WANT TO GET AWAY FROM HIS PROBLEMS; BUT AS MOST OF YOU KNOW HE'S ONLY RUNNING INTO MORE. THE NEXT CHAPTER IS OF COURSE ABOUT EVIL MOONS, THREE DAY PERIODS, GROUNDHOG'S DAY REFRENCES, AND THE LIKE. EXPECT IT SOON AFTER THE GAME IS RELEASED. I'VE GIVEN YOU GUYS A MONTH TO E-MAIL ME WITH ANYTHING YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE NEXT CHAPTER.


	8. Tribute to the Extras

It's been almost a year since the Hentai of Time started and after reading the first one you might think it was a romance between Ruto and Link that would last forever. In the second and third you find out that he's not faithful and it pretty much got more perverted from then on. Why? Because my fan-base is equally split between people who'd like it to be much more disgusting; and the ones who are happy that it's not just a quick, plotless wham-bam thing. Well I do try to maintain plot and he does love every woman in their own way, but basically some of you may think I ruined my original premise. It was something like dicks aren't eleven feet long, and virgins don't suck each other off, and they're especially nervous; but I haven't worked with virgins since the first chapter so I feel I'm okay (though I will whenever I get around to the other Zelda games). It's one of those you-can't-please-everyone-so-you've-got-to-please- yourself things, and I want to write about all the sexy women that appear in the game (I was even debating releasing all my manly urges and having him screw all the Gerardos senseless, man that would be the life; but too hard to write, and too boring to read). So, if you want a romantic love-story where Link's faithful then write your own (and send it to me, I might even post it on my site!). I seemed to have jumped the gun last time; no one seemed to understand me using the extras, but now they are twenty of the main points in the game. Jim and the bombers are a bit gay with their notebooks and helping people (these are rowdy kids here) and there are several other stinky things like Link being a kid, but all in all it's a pretty cool game. The extras don't just sit there, THEY MOVE! I don't just mean they appear in different places from time to time, I actually followed the Cuccu/bottle-giving lady (from the last part) from her hotel to a bench, WALKING! I know this may not seem like much when I talk about it but I've been playing this series since the mid-eighties and this is the most revolutionary breakthrough they've really had (the next one would be talking, like Star Fox did). Anyway, here's another tribute to the extras who deserve all the lustful energy the stars receive (I didn't feel like skipping straight to a story with Ruto's dimensional double, Lulu, and Link's Zoran form, Mikau; right off the bat. There's a lot of ground to cover and the first sexy lady who wasn't in the last part just happened to be... _read story_)

Part VIII - "Tribute to the Extras"  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 10-26-00

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON WRITTEN USING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN TURN BACK NOW, (AND UNLIKE CERTAIN OTHER FANFIC WRITERS, I AM OVER 18 MYSELF SO I SPEAK WITH RELATIVE AUTHORITY.)

Link woke up to the sounds of someone blowing on his Ocarina. [Oh, man... what hit me? Where am I? Who is that?] The skull-kid saw that he was being watched so he innocently stuck the instrument behind his back with an I-didn't-do-it look. Link lunged at him, but he jumped landing on Epona riding her away as fast as he could. Link held on for as long as he could but finally let go. [With my luck there'll be twenty temples between me and him...] Link thought, but he was wrong. After falling down one pit he met up with Skull-kid again who basically said "I got rid of your horse" then proceeded to shake rocks out of his face. Link was now doomed to stay a deku-shrub forever and I'll skip a lot of details here so as not to ruin it for the people who haven't played the game yet (this fic was originally released 10/26, the day the game hit the shelves).

"Tingle! Tingle! Kooloo-Limpah! These are magic words Tingle created for himself, do not steal them!" said Tingle the 35 year old "fairy incarnate."

[Yeah, I think it's safe... no one in their right mind would steal that] Link thought as he took his 5 rupee Clock Town map. [Hmmm, this is a big town... I wonder where he could be?] Skip a few more spoilers and he's got a password to the observatory; where he obtained the rarest of rare items, a moon-tear (meteorite from evil-moon's left eye); boy was he pissed when he found out he had to trade it for a deed to a flower.

Anyway, he had two days left until the tower opened so he thought he'd look around town some more. He had blushed when he found out that the cuccu lady was the innkeeper, and apparently her name was Anju. That was pretty cool, only he didn't have a chance with her here until he became human... or grew some vine-whipping, naughty tentacle things. In any case he didn't like the way her grandma called him Tortus and told long, boring stories. He later found out she had a long-lost love named Kafei (rhymes with gay) which made him feel really bad. [I know thins is some sort of parallel dimension, but what if the one I slept with had someone like that, and there I was screwing her in his absence.]

Link heard the fireworks go off and Tatl said, "That's your que." [As if all the ringing and Earth-shattering quakes didn't already tip you off].

"Ah, what the hell? If everyone's gonna die, I might as well." Link smirked.

"What are you thinking?!" she yelled.

"I'd like to deposit all my money, that's 99 rupees." the banker stamped his hand.

Tatl fell to the ground in a face-fault. "Can we please get going?"

Link when into the tower, skipped some more spoilers and everything went back to the beginning again (you guys have to see this for yourselves, it's pretty cool). The crappy mask guy helped remove Link's curse, sealing it in a mask. And so he was free to do as he pleased as long as he got Majora's Mask back within a month of Sundays (actually an infinite number of three-day periods). Link liked exploring this place; Guru-Guru, the guy with the music box, seemed a lot happier, even goofy. He also met several fine women including the lovely Rosa twin sisters and his old buddy the Bombachu lady (now working at a treasure chest shop)... [I never did find out what she thinks about me, but I'm too embarrassed to ask... oh no... now I'm horny again, and I doubt this annoying fairy will let me take twenty minutes out of a day for relief; let alone help.] Link was remembering his romp with Navi.

"Hey kid!" "Come here!" "No one is depositing money in my bank, help me out please!"

"I already did." Link said without thinking. [Oops, I hope there's not a long-winded, don't-lie speech headed this way.]

The banker looked at Link's hand, "Oh, I'm so forgetful! Sorry, your current balance is 99, what do you want to do? Deposit or withdraw?" Link was shocked that this was working and since he was embarrassed he deposited the 42 Rupees he was carrying. "Okay let me re-stamp you, 141. Have a nice day!"

Link having found a new crazy moneymaking scheme went off collecting money and bringing it to the bank. He even memorized the hands at poker that those guys would get and made out like a bandit every time. It was enough to keep him distracted from his problems; like having to help Kotake and Koume, saving that one monkey (which he hadn't been able to accomplish yet), and most importantly not having sex. But one day (around 9:30pm) when he walked to the bank to deposit his money the clerk burst out in tears. "What's wrong?"

"How could I have forgotten this!?" *sob* "I only have 500 Rupees in my bank, but here you are and I owe you nearly 800? That's it! I'm bankrupt, there's no hope left. Please take the fiver and don't call the cops on me, it was an honest mistake." *sob*

Link had a very sad look on his face, he suddenly realized exactly what was happening; and he felt really bad about it. Here he was depleting the banker's money source through time-paradox-technicalities for his own greedy, yet pointless ambitions.

The banker looked up, "How about a trade for goods or services? I've got connections that could set you up."

"Set me up? Like a date?" Link asked.

"You into compensated dating? The secretary at the Mayor's office owes me a favor! Follow me, kid." Link had an uneasy feeling.

When they arrived the two talked for a while and then the secretary turned to Link, "Why I'd love to! He's sooo cute, too! And to think this is all I have to do to pay back-" she trailed off snickering and whispering with the banker. Link was confused, but the banker left and the secretary lead him into the next room (pointing ala Bulma escorting Vegeta to the bathroom). Link followed almost in a trance-

"Snap out of it! What are you doing? You can't just do this! I refuse to let you bed this woman to pay off poker debts. You have to-"

Link flicked Tatl into a potted plant, "Listen, I am a guy; and you've kept me from jacking off for about a week, it's a wonder I didn't kill someone."

She had never seen Link that way; he had the lust in his eyes the Skull-kid had when he picked up the mask. [I guess I'll let this one slide, but if he isn't nicer afterwards I'm gonna have to do something]. She flew out of the pot and into the room as the door closed, perching on a bookshelf.

"S o . . . It looks like I'm your slave until morning. Tee-hee. What do you want to do first, you little maniac?" She said leaning against the bedpost. She had green hair and orange freckles; she wore a short, white shirt which exposed her belly; and a full-length, brown skirt. (If you ask me that last one sounds out of place).

Link remembered Anju's significant other and didn't want a repeat performance, so he asked "Ummm, are you sure about this? Isn't this a bit much? All I did was deposit a lot of money..."

"You mean paid a lot of money, it's 8 hours until morning and I'm giving you all 800 Rupees worth tonight." She removed her skirt reveling her green, deku-shrub panties.

"Ummm, okay, okay... but don't you feel used or anything?" Link asked.

"I happen to have a forest fetish, I like everything green and you just happen to be covered in it. Plus I like little elven men like you... a lot." she rubbed Link's hand against her panties to show that she was already soaking.

[Close enough] Link reached for his tool but she stopped him.

"That's for me to do. Do you want me to use my hands or mouth?"

"Yeah..." Link fell back on the bed as she kissed, stroked, licked, and sucked his member to hardness. Link gripped the bed sheets [No! Too soon! Must control-] *SPEW*

She looked a bit surprised at his quickness but swallowed as much as she could before saying, "Wow, a gusher; your body is very truthful. I've never seen someone stay hard through an orgasm. So do you want it now or would you prefer to taste me?" She pulled her dripping panties off and they made a loud slurping noise.

When Link heard/saw that he lost all control, he pushed her onto the floor and started drilling her fast and roughly. She came twice before he picked her up and placed her on the bed, still pounding. He felt her getting close again, he was going to try to hold out for her; but soon he found himself pumping his seed into her, fortunately sending her over the edge too. As Link regained his breath he said "Thankyou, oh thankyouthankyouthankyou, wow, oh I needed that."

"However did you get so horny? Did you forget to masturbate for a week?" She joked.

"It wasn't my idea," Link said.

"Well, there's still 6 hours till morning, you want to cuddle or go at it again?"

"I'm sorry I was so rough, are you sore?" he asked.

"A little, but it's okay; this is your night. We could try changing positions." she got up on her hands and knees.

Link entered her slowly this time and gently rocked his hips back and forth; he reached under her now sweat-soaked shirt and fondled her breasts. [I can't believe I left this on. I like tits, I guess I shouldn't ever go that long again.] He started rubbing them more frantically as he increased his speed. Soon they were standing up while he pounded into her, [This seems so familiar, I wonder if she's Saria's double in this world; she looks a bit like her, if she had left the forest and grown up.]

Link woke up around noon to Tatl poking him in the side- err kicking. "Wake up you lazy boy, we need to get going!" She looked really pissed as she tapped her foot in mid-air impatiently. "You're going to have to really push yourself to make up for lost time."

"I'm sorry, I guess I got a little bit evil last night. If you give me 20mins to myself each day I promise this will never happen again." Link said.

"Awww, you don't have to be faithful for me... just will you get clean? You smell kind of _interesting_. I don't want people to think-" Tatl started.

"Faithful? For you? I meant I was sorry for wasting you're precious, infinite time. Anyway, you smell funny too, what were you doing?" Link questioned.

She blushed and looked to the side.

"You little pervert!" Link noticed that the bottom of her dress had cum stains, "You were watching us, and fingering yourself too!"

"It's no worse than you!" she yelled.

"I never thought you were into voyeurism. So, are you interested in another show? Perhaps you'd like to-" he was interrupted by 12 bongs. "Well I guess we'd better get going after all. You should have told me sooner, then I would have hit you."

Link and Tatl had made some sort of agreement about "time management" and they often bathed together (possibly more later); and Link had learned his lesson on "stealing" money (not really). And everything seemed right with the world... except that damn moon. So off he headed again to the Deku Palace. [I wonder if this princess of theirs is fine?]

END, SEE YOU NEXT MONTH!

Well, these last two chapters read like fanfics... which is what they were. It's hard to get something really going on between these characters, so they end up prostituting themselves. So here's a question, what gender is the banker? It's the same person who's always hitting it's knees asking you to sell them something with "C" (I think it's a woman, and my sister thinks it's a man; it's hard to tell with that hat covering the face). Anyway, you may have noticed I've changed the format a little. No more Author's Notes in all caps and I've changed the schedule to one fic a month (which is what it basically averages out to, just now I'm more consistent). I also, "Bad-dah-bah!" ran spell check... I really should have before, but I will from now on. Next month I won't skip spoilers because anyone who is ever going to pass it, would have by then. E-mail me if you have any comments, suggestions, or stuff like that.


	9. The Romani Breed

Okay about the last chapter: 1) I've decided the banker is a female (not that it matters now), 2) I realize that the game not only doesn't address the fact that you're stealing the banker's money, but also encourages it (if you deposit 5,000 you get a piece of heart); it makes you do lots of evil things, like steal Link-goro's room, 3) when I said "... then proceeded to shake rocks out of his face" I was referring to the noise Skull Kid makes all the time, it might be bone-rattling, the Deku also make this sound, 4) Everyone that is going to, should have passed the game by now so I'll go more in depth on this part, but not too much. What makes a character an extra? I've been going overboard on minuscule characters lately, but what constitutes a main character? Link, Zelda, and Ganon are gimmies. Though Zelda and Ganon seem to have trouble making it to sequels. In Zelda-Ocarina there were 7 sages, all of which could be classified as main characters because they were key elements to sealing Ganon. Malon, however, (though she has nothing going for her other than being a Marin rip-off and her father asking Link to marry her) is often treated like a main character and seems to be the favored coupling among people. Why? Ask them. Anyway, this story is about the two girls who look just like Malon (Older Malon=Cremia, Younger Malon=Romani), whether or not they are extras is up to you.

Part IX - "The Romani Breed"  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 11-28-00

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON WRITTEN USING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN TURN BACK NOW, (AND UNLIKE CERTAIN OTHER FANFIC WRITERS, I AM OVER 18 MYSELF SO I SPEAK WITH RELATIVE AUTHORITY.)

Link had passed the first temple and found out that the Deku princess was cute... for a Deku- but he decided not to try anything, because he knew he'd regret it later. He had also "healed" Darmani's soul into a Goron mask. He was sure the secretary was Saria's twin because of her "style" (they say love-making is like your finger print) and he was happy to see that his friend could grow up to be so cute, that is if she left the forest. It was a bit disturbing that after unpoisoning the lake that nothing had changed because he had run out of time and reset. Anyway, with his new Goron abilities he could lift huge explosive kegs, so he headed off to 'Milk Road' to see why Romani always had that dead look when he visited on the third day. Imagine his surprise when he saw her running around.

"Oh hello, who are you? I'm Romani... I was given the same name as the ranch. You're wearing green clothes, and you patter about when you walk, so the name Romani gives to you is: Grasshopper. Romani was practicing... For tonight... Tonight... They are coming... They come at night... Every year when the carnival approaches... They come riding in a bright, shining ball. A whole lot of them come down. And then... They come to the barn... My older sister won't believe me... But Romani must protect the cows! Hey, Grasshopper, I'm recruiting for an assistant right now! You're a boy, won't you try?"

[She sure talks a lot, and has a very active imagination, but at least she's got her priorities straight.] "Sure, why not sounds like fun." [You don't suppose the cow-snatchers actually exist, do you?] he thought to himself, [Why else would she be so spacey when I come here on the third day?]

Romani smiled, "Great! Now that's the spirit, Grasshopper!" she explained the details and put Link through a short training exercise. He passed it effortlessly and she told him to come meet her at two (AM).

Link agreed and went off to see this "older sister" of hers. [Hey look, it's Malon! Again? There's two... how odd. Of course there's three Ingos also. I wonder if she does horses and stuff like the other one...] Link walked up to her and she turned around.

"Did you come from town? Then that means the road's free. And I can deliver Milk again!" Cremia said.

"Ummm," Link started.

"Do you know of the Romani breed?" she continued.

"Well, I..." he was cut-off.

"The special Romani bred cows-" and continued.

[Romani breeds cows? But they're girls?! Oh, right; the ranch.]

"-are the source of Chateau Romani, the most desired of forbidden milk! It is mystical milk that fills you with Magic Power... If you seek the dreamy milk of Chateau Romani, please visit Latte, near Clock Town's East Gate." She paused, "How was my sales pitch? I wonder if I said it just like it's written in the brochure." She looked down back at Link, though she obviously wasn't looking for an answer.

"Forbidden ... milk ... ?"

"It's for adults only, come back when you grow up kid." She turned back around and continued milking the cow.

Link contemplated putting on his Goron mask, but decided not to. If he was going to make love, it was going to be for love, not size. Besides, he didn't know what Darmani (the Goron Mask's spirit) would think. So he played the song of double time to warp to nightfall. He walked into their house to see how things were going. Once again all Cremia would talk about was her sales pitch.

"That again, sister? I'm sick of hearing it!" Romani complained.

"I'm supposed to! It's work! Work!" she replied.

"Who are you trying to convince? Us or yourself?" Link said sarcastically.

"That's it, Romani, your little friend has to go; you can play tomorrow." she shewed Link out the door and locked it. "Honestly, who does he think he is anyway... he just walked in here and started talking."

[Actually you've been the one that's talking.] "It's my fault, I recruited him for the mission-" Cremia scolded her for making up such wild stories.

Link listened for a while but soon left. [That poor girl, she just has an active imagination... unless it's true; in which case it's even worse.] Later that night around 2, Romani shook Link awake from the pile of hay and sent him outside. "I wasn't sleeping, I was just resting my eyes..." Link shot down every ghost he saw, but he soon heard a scream coming from behind him. Cows and Romani were floating up into a large glowing sphere. [Ouch, it looks like I goofed it.]

The next morning Cremia was very sad, talking about how if only she had listened, and that sort of thing. Link tried to calm her down, but he couldn't. He even tried shameless groping which got him slapped, but didn't change her mood any. [Man, it's like once I mess-up on a day, I get into this horrible, downward spiral before I give-up and restart.] So he reluctantly played the Song of Time.

"We did it, we won!" Romani danced.

[I did it, you mean. There was only one ghost that got inside last time and you let it take you. The only reason you're standing here is because of me.] Link thought to himself.

"Thank you! Thanks to you, the cows are giving thanks too! It's almost time for my sister to get up, so I have to get back to bed..." she kissed him on the nose, "See you later..." she walked a little ways, then turned and added "Little hero."

Link noticed that he really liked the thoughts of her, bed, the kiss, and the nickname "Little Hero." [Could I really prefer her over her sister? I mean attitude-wise it's no contest, but am I developing a lolita complex (or whatever they called it back then)? More importantly, if I do it with her does that make me a child molester? when I'm a child myself?]

He had many questions, and no answers. He slept all day and when he woke up, he saw Cremia loading up a stagecoach with milk. "Loading your jugs of forbidden milk on the wagon?" Link said, followed by a loud slap. He just couldn't resist, after she left he went inside to ask Romani what was going on; he found her at the table, fidgeting.

"Romani wishes she could go to the Carnival of Time just once! I've never been! My sister always tells me that I'll be an adult... someday! That's fine for her. She gets to go to town to make deliveries!" she sulked, "Romani knows... My sister, Cremia, has someone in town she likes... But that person will get married the day of the carnival. It's hard for my sister... Going into town..."

Link thought there was something odd going on (of course he didn't find out how odd until the next chapter). He walked over to her side of the table, "What are you doing? You've got your hands... down there..."

"Romani is sorry!" she screamed, "Romani touches herself... a lot! It feels so good, but I sometimes can't seem to stop, even when you're watching me." she paused "In fact, when you look at me, it gets even harder to stop."

"Why didn't you say something? I know of a way to make you feel better without touching yourself-" Link paused, "By letting me... trust me, it's a lot better than it sounds."

"Really?" she smiled, "You don't mind?"

"Actually it's my pleasure." he was behind her now and was rubbing her womanhood and feeling her up, the whole time come was oozing out onto the floor. He decided not to let it all go to waste so he moved around and started licking it up."

"Oh no! You don't have to do that! Oh! Romani feels sooo strange-" she clenched herself and came all over Link's face. "Oh, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Romani will clean that up." she said as she started licking his face.

[So is she naive, or not? Link wonders- now she's got me doing it!] Link caught her tongue as it passed by with his and kissed her deeply. [Whatever the answer is, it can wait.] He started moving down a sucking on her nipples even though she was still flat. But when he flipped up his tunic she covered her face.

"Ahhh! What is that!? Cremia doesn't have one of those! It looks, so... so-"

"That's because she's a girl and I'm a boy... is there something you want to tell me?"

"Do all boys' have things like that? I wonder if it tastes like Cremia's..." Link was taken by surprise when she stuck it in her mouth. She was good! Link had never gotten head this good before! He orgasmed in her mouth quickly, and she swallowed all of it. "Mmmmm, better than Cremia's... but it's still yucky-looking, why does it stick out so far?"

"I could show you, but you have to promise not to scream." she nodded and so he continued by lifting her up and placing her on top of it. "This may hurt a little at first, but once we get started it will feel great." He slowly pushed more of himself inside, stretching her pussy lips apart until he felt something snap. [Ooooh, it's sooooo tight! No one's every been this tight... I'd better be careful not to come quickly in this little- virgin- hole-]

"Ouch! It's stretching me, it hurts, it hurts... and it's still getting bigger!"

"You'll feel good soon enough," he pulled out a little before shoving it back in further.

"Unh," [What is this? I've had my sister's finger in me before, but this is too much!]

Link retreated, then slammed in harder; each thrust made him thrust harder, sending them through an endless loop of ecstasy. "How is it? Is it better now?"

"It's strange, it hurt, but it feels good... oh, please don't stop!"

Link couldn't take it anymore, he stopped moving, trying hard to keep himself intact; but she had been meeting his thrusts and only went faster after he stopped. [I'm loosing it...] He shot his warm seed deep inside her, moaning her name "ooohhhhh... Ro-ma-n-i-"

"Link! What are you doing? I don't know if it's safe for this stuff to go in there."

"It's alright, we were making love... and I put my love into you-" was he making excuses, or just lying to a little kid? [Does she know about pregnancies? I can never tell how naive she is.] "But are you going to tell me where you learned all this stuff?"

"My sister... is... that is... she really likes... ... ... girls... a lot... and she sort of... practices... on me." She looked upset, "Did Romani do something wrong?"

"No, no, no, of course not..." [Good-god lesbians! I can barely handle her tender, young flesh, now this? I wonder if she'll let me do it again?]

"Ahh! I'm bleeding! This is your fault! Romani never bled with other girls!"

Link apologized and said that he'd clean it up. But by the time he was finished, they were both so horny again that she agreed to let him try again.

"You're sure I won't bleed again?" she asked. Link promised and she added, "If I do, I'm biting yours until it bleeds!" which for some reason turned Link on even more. She was now on her knees, he positioned himself behind her and rubbed his member against her sex. He inserted the tip and then slowly pushed the rest in. "Oooo, this feels much better than last time."

"I told you so," Link said increasing his stride. He grabbed her little hips as she matched his rhythm. [She's so perfect! She's every man's dream, a virgin and a whore (quote from someone famous). I think I love her- but I love Ruto- I mean Zelda, I mustn't forget...] but after a couple minutes he heard the door open.

"WHAT?! ROMANI WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Cremia looked pissed.

Link pulled out in fear, but when the cold air hit it, he shot a string of jism into the air, covering Romani's back. [Hunh, just like in Nano-Nymphs...] "Uh... this... isn't... what... it... looks... ... like..." [exactly like in Nano-Nymphs...] "She just tripped... and I-" Link grabbed his tunic and ran towards the door.

Cremia kicked him in the butt on the way out and slammed and locked the door again. "Romani! Just look at you! You're all messy! Now I'm gonna have to clean this all up..."

TO BE CONTINUED, SEE YOU NEXT MONTH!

Well, how was it? Was it good for you? I've put several quotes from the game in this time, and as far as I can tell Cremia really is gay. They keep hinting at it like they don't want people to think they're homo-phobic, but they also never come out of the closet and say it. Romani never discloses the gender of the one Cremia loves, and when Link does take the ride with her she talks about her good friend Anju. Then later she's talking to Romani about how she has finally grown up, and tonight Romani is going to sleep in her bed with her. This is my first real two-parter; I've always continued, but this time it will be to complete this chapter. Since I was a little late on this one, I will try to release the next one early.


	10. To Cream a Cremia

Last year on Zelda-HOT, Cremia (Older Malon-looking girl) had just come in on Romani (Younger Malon-looking girl) and Link going at it like weasels; so she kicked him out and now she's scolding her sister. And from now on my author's notes are going at the end of the fanfic (so you don't have to read them).

Part X - "To Cream a Cremia"  
by: Kevin Keane  
Original date written: 02-28-02

THE FOLLOWING IS A LEMON WRITTEN USING CHARACTERS OWNED BY NINTENDO. IT CONTAINS ADULT MATERIAL AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE UNDER 18. IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN TURN BACK NOW, (AND UNLIKE CERTAIN OTHER FANFIC WRITERS, I AM OVER 18 MYSELF SO I SPEAK WITH RELATIVE AUTHORITY.)

Link stood up and looked to make sure no one was around, "I can't believe I just did that..." he said to himself. He sat down in a haystack by the door and put his tunic back on. "It's just she was so cute, and willing..."

"And a whore!" added Tatl.

"Ahhhh! What are you doing here?"

"I live here." (referring to his hat) "If you're still horny I could use a tongue bath," she said indicating all the cum she had gotten on herself.

"Not now, I need to think..."

-Meanwhile, back inside-

"Romani! Just look at you! You're all messy! Now I'm gonna have to clean this all up..." Cremia said grabbing a towel and wiping the semen off of her sister.

"Why does Cremia have to waste all of Link- I mean Grasshopper's love? It tastes better than the Rosa sisters' and yours." Romani cringed at the look Cremia gave her, "Romani is so sorry, it's just that boys have these things on them; and they feel so good, taste so good, oooo... Romani wishes she had one!"

"It's called a dick, and men try to control you with them. When you become a slave to a cock, you've lost all your freedom." She continued cleaning off her nether regions, "Just look at you, you've had your poor little cunny fucked raw. It's all pink now."

"It's okay, Romani doesn't mind. Boys and dicks can be fun. It actually feels very good. Why doesn't Cremia try it?" she asked.

"I did..." she told Romani a stereotypical traumatic past story about some nameless guy who she slept with because Kafei wouldn't betray Anju and how the nameless one abused her... "And then I met Marilla (Blue) and Judo (Red) Rosa, who taught me how to get along without men. I promised mom I wouldn't use this on you until you were an adult, but tonight you've proven to me that you are."

Romani's eyes got really big, "Waaaa! What is that? Is that a... ah-"

Cremia was now wearing a double-sided strap-on and said, "With this I am superior to men and women, I will be the best lover you've ever had." She rubbed something all around it and started licking at Romani's crotch, "You still have traces of the one who betrayed you in here," she massaged some of it between her legs, "but don't worry, your big sister knows how to fix that."

"Romani was not betrayed, Grasshopper loves Romani!"

Cremia slipped the tip in, "Then where is he now?"

"You scared him away, oohhhh..."

"He doesn't love you, you were just a one night stand; I bet you'll never even see him again." she said pushing herself in as far as she could.

"Oh! He'll come back, you'll see. He won't abandon Romani!" but she already doubted it.

"Oh, Romani!" she yelled feeling the recoil of the dildo, "You're so tight!" Cremia said picking her up and thrusting into her repetiveley while standing. "Admit it, I'm better than any man could ever be!"

Romani's cum was splashing all over the place "Oh-ah! No! Cremia is too rough! Link loves me and does it as gently as possible."

-Meanwhile, back outside-

"Gosh, she's really rough, hunh? She got mad at you, but she's doing even worse!" Tatl exclaimed, stroking herself while she watched the sisters going at it.

"Man, Romani is too cute for her own good... if I leave her with her sister she'll be raped to death, but if I take her with me I won't be able to concentrate on anything..." Link said, feeling his manhood try to escape his tunic. "What to do, what to do..."

"You could use your Goron Mask to 'punish' her," Tatl suggested, Link just gave her a dirty look. "No really, Darmani(Goron-Link)'s cock is like twice the size of a normal one, I can't even get my arms around it! Anyway, you go in there and proclaim you're the soldier of love justice (or something) and then use all those techniques 'not-Saria' taught you to make her beg for more; then don't give it to her and say you'll only come again if she's nice to Romani."

Link just continued giving her a dirty look, "You've been reading too many love scrolls*." (*A love scroll is a masturbatory fantasy written by some jerk who couldn't write a decent plot to save his life, today these are called fanfics or Penthouse-letters).

"Come on, this is your chance to live one; that's every nerd's dream!" she exclaimed.

Link looked inside, Cremia had three fingers in Romani's ass while she gave one final blow with her strap-on. Romani's eyes glazed over and she fainted. "There," she smiled as she wiped the sweat off her forehead, "and I'm gonna do the same to you if you don't leave this ranch immediately!" she yelled as she pointed toward Link.

Link was in a slight state of shock; if Cremia didn't have such an angry expression on her face he might not have believed her. But thankfully he did and ran or else things would have gotten ugly.

For the next two hours Link paced back and forth behind the barn, he had so many things on his mind. There were all the moral issues about whether or not he should be having sex at all like always, but now there were even more things to worry about. For starters Cremia scarred him; monsters and demons he could fight, but women were different. The easiest solution was to start over and make sure he didn't get caught when he did it, but for some reason that just didn't seem right. It seems he should try to make things right even if they would reset after tomorrow... and if Cremia was like this now it meant she always was so he had to save Romani... but he wasn't much better... what he needed to do was. . . . .

Link had trailed off to sleep, the dawn of the final day came and in the afternoon several townsfolk came to seek refuge. Cremia opened the door to the barn, "Come in here where no one will bother us."

"Romani is scarred, what if the moon does destroy the Earth?" she cried.

"Look you're an 'adult' know, I'm not gonna lie to you... there is a possibility that none of us will be alive tomorrow; and although it isn't much, my plan is simply to have as much fun as we can and try to forget it." Cremia replied.

Romani blushed, she was not new to this sort of lifestyle but she was still a little shy, "So why isn't Anju here? This is probably your last chance." Cremia started crying, "Oh! I'm so sorry, Romani didn't mean it that way!" Romani said in a sort of don't-hit-me pose.

Cremia looked upward, "She just looks so sad, she's waited and saved herself for so long and all I wish is that she can be happy. But... I'm not the one she wants, I've never even told her how I feel, I can't." she wiped her tears "I really am an idiot."

"..." Romani felt sorry for her sister, but she didn't know what to do or say.

"It's okay, I'm finally over her," Cremia said, "from now on you're the only one for me, I love you so much I'll even let you screw around with that green-kid if you see him again." Romani's eyes sparkled a little as her big sister held her face close for a deep kiss.

-Scene change, fade to black-

"What in the Hell are you talking about?! You don't even resemble Kafei in the slightest!" Anju yelled while throwing things, "You're just wearing that stupid mask his mom made to encourage people to look for him! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!" Just as he was hit with a bookshelf, Link sat up with cold sweat dripping from him. [Whoa! I haven't actually had a dream for a while; I guess this means I've finally gotten enough sleep. I can't believe that dream though, no one's stupid enough to even think for a minute a wooden mask is going to fool someone like her. Although I can see me trying I get so horny sometimes. Sometimes I even make believe I can hear people having sex...] "Wait a minute..." Link peered down from his haystack.

"That's it Romani! Just a little bit more, and AHHH!" Cremia gripped her little sister's head with her thighs as she let loose a powerful orgasm. "You're a natural... I hope I didn't squeeze too tight..."

"Romani is okay, but now it is her turn to get off, right?" she asked.

Cremia smiled, "Yes, and I have a special treat for you too." She looked directly at Link, "Come on down greenjumpper."

"Grasshopper?" Romani looked around.

"Actually it's, uhhh... Link."

"Whatever, I've decided to let you share my sister; on the occasion that it's the last day." Link hesitated, "I'll just wait over here." she sat in a corner away from Romani.

[This is almost too good to be true, I mean getting permission...] Link started to walk closer before realizing [but _she_ will be watching us...] his member started expanding [if I can 'do a good job' on her maybe I can finally get Cremia...] his gaze settling on Romani's naked form [not that I won't enjoy her!]

"Oh, Romani is so wet! Please come inside Romani and give her your love! 3*" (*ummm, that's supposed to be a heart)

Link painstakingly suppressed the urge to grab her by the hips and plunge into her as fast and as many times as possible, [this has got to be good! Very good] He had to bring her off without using his manhood, [easy right?] "Not yet, I'm going to make you feel good before I... start..." [oh, great remind me not to talk] He started licking her lower lips and biting her clitoris and trying to do the things 'not-Saria' (she really needs a name) had tried to teach him when he wasn't listening, fortunately Romani was so horny already she orgasmed three times in a row just thinking about what his manhood was about to do to her.

Link hoped he was making a good impression, though Cremia's seemingly unblinking eyes were giving his the creeps. Before he knew it he was about to cum inside of Romani when her sister stopped them. "I want to see you cum in her ass." she commanded, to which Link half heartedly obliged.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh-aaaaaah~~~! 3" Romani screamed as she felt her butt-cheeks spread apart from Link's invading member.

Cremia was getting more and more excited as she watched her sister's mouth open wide and reveal the spittle (or the residue her own juices) inside, not to mention the wide-eyed expression of loosing her virginity in back too. Noticing that Romani had just had two more orgasms she decided that if she wanted a piece she'd have to join soon. She stood up and walked towards her sister, "And now the fun really begins!" she smiled wickedly.

Link started to back up, bringing a small whimper from Romani; but Cremia stopped him. "Now you are going to experience both of us at the same time!" Link immediately hardened again.

Romani's face lit up "Does that mean you two don't hate each other anymore?!" she smiled, "Ooooh~~ Romani wants to feel both of your love! Please give it to her!"

Link was going to point out that he had never 'hated' Cremia, he just found her a little creepy at times... which was her fault anyway. But before he could form words Cremia had already slipped the entire length of her strap-on into Romani's quivering pussy. He didn't want to miss his chance so he slipped himself back inside her backdoor. Romani kept screaming things like 'YES' and 'HARDER' and about how much she loved both of them and how, even if it was the last day she was glad that they were together. After five more orgasms she passed out with a big smile on her face.

Suddenly Link came off his high, [Last day, oh crap! I forgot again! I'd better play the song of time quickly before-] but he was cut off as Cremia removed her strap-on, placed it next to her unconscious sister's body, and smiled seductively. [Oh, right... her... maybe I still have time...]

"You know what? I like you. I'm glad I let you two fuck, I haven't seen her this excited for a long time. In fact it's gotten me so hot I've decided to grace your body with the pleasures of full grown women," she said, but Link was so dazed he didn't even notice the plural and started towards her. "Come on in girls!" she shouted.

Marilla and Judo Rosa stepped in, not that you could tell them apart without their clothes anyway. They descended upon Link saying only one word, "Master!"

-Several hours later, 5am-

Link woke up to some of the most violent Earthquakes he's ever felt, he was sore all over and tangled in a mess of body parts whom he wasn't sure who they belonged to. He finally got untangled and stood up; yawning... he looked over to see one of the Rosas (but he didn't know which one) in a very erotic position with his ocarina sticking out of her ass. [How'd it get there? I probably shouldn't use it again, knowing where it's been.] He looked over to Cremia to see that she had her eyes open. [What...?]

"I've lived in denial long enough, I want your cock inside me! I want you to violently pound me into the ground with that monster and make me pregnant!" she said as she leaped on him. After sucking him hard again she said, "You can't believe how much it turns me on that you're still going, you have so much stamina for your age... if I had only one wish it would be that the world wasn't ending any minute now."

As she straddled Link her words sunk in, [OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!] Link looked around desperately [where was my ocarina? I've got to get it quickly! I've got to get it and use it now! OHGODOHGODOHGOD] he panicked.

"Come on don't worry, we've known this was coming for three days now. Just try not to think too much about it, and live only for the moment!" she said [your last moment!] she almost chuckled.

Link's life flashed before his eyes all the women he'd fucked, all the ones he hadn't, all the ones he wanted to, all the ones he didn't... there were even some guys he didn't want to see die. But that all didn't seem to matter now, and as the moon came crashing into the planet causing a giant fiery shock-wave Link managed to have that one, final, last, all-important, strenuous, orgasm. A literal half-a-second after shooting his seed deep inside Cremia's body they were all consumed by flames and torn to pieces. He had finally creamed Cremia.

Skull-kid laughed at the desolate, lifeless planet; "That'll teach you!"

AND FINALLY, THE END!  
Thank you for putting up with me over the last two years (10-13-99 to 02-28-02), good-bye.

Well? Now that you've read it you understand why I didn't want to release it, right? I mean, for one thing I tried to do too much at a time and didn't go into detail for any of it. You see a girl who goes by the name "Sheik-with-a-strap-on*" requested bondage stuff, and so I tried to do that. Several people wanted lezbo too, but it just didn't seem to work out, so instead of killing two birds with one stone I ended up killing my fanfic. Also that paragraph with Anju and Link in Kafei's mask is me making fun of all the people who requested it. Out of all my requests, from Link/Gannon to Zelda/Nabooru to Islandturtlething/Lulu and so on, Anju and Link in Kafei's mask has been requested the most (5!) and all I have to say is: "No one's stupid enough to even think for a minute a wooden mask is going to fool someone like her." If you absolutely need a fanfic like that then write it yourself, but for heaven's sake don't post it anywhere; some of us have souls (albeit small ones). (*she ran the Zelda Hentai RPG Club before she disappeared without telling anyone anything (that I know of); oddly enough her last post was about how big a problem people who didn't post were.) One thing I didn't make clear last time, was that when Link suspects that Romani's doing something weird behind the table and finds that she's touching herself... a lot; it is a reference to her "sitting cycle" which looks exceptionally weird because she rocks back and forth with her hands between her legs, and if you look at her from the other side of the table, she looks like she's playing with herself. You see in the beginning of "sprite" animation they had walk cycles with usually only two frames, but ever since Sonic the Hedgehog came out on-screen characters have been moving more and more. At first it was just tapping a foot when left alone for a while, but eventually all characters developed standing cycles; it got out of control in 3D games because once you had the characters you could move them however you want without any extra effort. They got sitting cycles, breathing cycles, etc., and never stop moving (it's kind of annoying at times). But there is one game that has balance: Sonic Advance, it has so much character animation in it that it's embarrassing to play the old games. After Sonic Adventure I thought I'd never see a new sprite game, let alone a good one; so far it's the only game he's made that's better than Sonic & Knuckles (a.k.a. Sonic4). Anyway, that ends my animation cycle synopsis/Sonic Advance commercial; I'll move on. Anyway, I'm sorry Judo & Marilla (the Rosa sisters) made such a small cameo but if they got their own chapter it'd just be 'reward' for teaching them to dance and I've got enough chapters that I'm not writing as it is, I don't want to get even further behind. Besides someone's already done it. As for the ending, well I was planning to release this chapter 3 months after the last one, which gave me enough time to see how corny and unplanned it was. So I tried to fix it without much luck, here it is a full year later and I still haven't gotten it straight so I figured, what the heck? Anyway, those of you who've played the game should understand what's going on and don't spoil it for the rest of my readers, tell them to just go out and buy the damn game.

**All right, it's me (not the author) again. All I have to say is OH MY WORD 20,000+ VIEWS?! I guess it's the name that attracts, right? Well, I'm glad so many of you guys liked it (and also a little jealous for myself). But I have to say this to the four followers it has: I'm sure you noticed the date this was written (not uploaded, but written by Kevin Keane) and I can tell you there's no more. This was written when Majora's Mask just came out, and it hasn't been added to since (that I know of). Sorry, I'm not even sure if the author is still alive.** **Now to reply to some reviews:**

**To "Guest" (on chapter 10): Yea, you can tell he was rushed into the ending. I was kind of let down on that, too. Maybe I should give it a new ending? Nah, let's preserve what we have.**

**To "Guest" (Someone else I think. On chapter 2): Haha! Didn't write it, but I did love it and share it, so I suppose I am guilty of being "one sick fella". Duly noted, carry on.**

**To "Rec-Bel-Eco" (Tried to figure out what that name could mean, but didn't think of anything): Yea, I remember spending days on these, thinking and hoping they would never end. Later, I tried to find his profile, but he was gone. Only his stories remained. Can't say he inspired me to write lemons, but he did get me hooked on Legend of Zelda pairings. Thanks for the comment :D**


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